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So I've been dating this girl for a while now and she thought it would be a good idea to meet her family at this point. She talks a lot about her mom and paints her as this real down to earth person, but the more she talks about her brother, the more it's clear he is a real life mall ninja. For what it's worth she doesn't know I'm a gun person (I had a crazy ex so playing it slow this time) so she always tells me about the new purchases he texts her about. Every text from him starts with the words; tactical, operator, milspec and ends with "stay safe and watch your six." Ummm ok?
Fast forward a few conversations and I agree to meet her family. On the way she tells me how she is going to tell her brother to take me to the range so he will somewhat bond with me and maybe be accepting. When the idea is brought up he says that prior to the range trip I had to "partake in a tactical safety briefing" and said to join him in his "war room", wtf? it wasn't anything special, it looked like every dining room in America. Anyway since it was the first conversation and being a bit nervous I decided to break the ice by saying that I was pretty good at with guns and know all the moves because I'm highly ranked playing Modern Warfare and watch a lot of Steven Segal movies. This sarcastic joke seemed to anger him and he went on about how his weapons are military spec and the same ones used by Seal Team 6. I should have been up front about the joke but figured it was not worth it. Anyway his sister made us try again and I played the role of a noob and let him instruct.
At the range the guns he handed me were shooting high and to the right no matter how calm and fundamentally correct I shot. It made him real upset when I asked if I could adjust the "aiming things" to shoot straighter. Anyway the range time was a failure and the drive home was worse. He kept slowly drifting to the right side of the road, so I kept bumping the steering wheel to keep it straight, I assumed he was tired or playing games but then I realized he has a lazy right eye. This also explained the the awkward sighting of the guns. I then overheard him telling his sister he was going to do a "Delta level interrogation" again wtf? He kept asking questions but it was hard to understand him now that I was told to sit in the backseat. I thought he asked what was my favorite drink and I showed him a picture on my phone of Bacardi 501, and he went off about a "5150", I said "what about a 5150? I volunteer at a 8 different psych wards, so am familiar with the term." Well that caused him to call me crazy and a "prohibited person", anyway he is talking to her on g-chat right now trying to break us up. Is this guy too mall ninjaish to be a potential brother in law? What say you?
Fast forward a few conversations and I agree to meet her family. On the way she tells me how she is going to tell her brother to take me to the range so he will somewhat bond with me and maybe be accepting. When the idea is brought up he says that prior to the range trip I had to "partake in a tactical safety briefing" and said to join him in his "war room", wtf? it wasn't anything special, it looked like every dining room in America. Anyway since it was the first conversation and being a bit nervous I decided to break the ice by saying that I was pretty good at with guns and know all the moves because I'm highly ranked playing Modern Warfare and watch a lot of Steven Segal movies. This sarcastic joke seemed to anger him and he went on about how his weapons are military spec and the same ones used by Seal Team 6. I should have been up front about the joke but figured it was not worth it. Anyway his sister made us try again and I played the role of a noob and let him instruct.
At the range the guns he handed me were shooting high and to the right no matter how calm and fundamentally correct I shot. It made him real upset when I asked if I could adjust the "aiming things" to shoot straighter. Anyway the range time was a failure and the drive home was worse. He kept slowly drifting to the right side of the road, so I kept bumping the steering wheel to keep it straight, I assumed he was tired or playing games but then I realized he has a lazy right eye. This also explained the the awkward sighting of the guns. I then overheard him telling his sister he was going to do a "Delta level interrogation" again wtf? He kept asking questions but it was hard to understand him now that I was told to sit in the backseat. I thought he asked what was my favorite drink and I showed him a picture on my phone of Bacardi 501, and he went off about a "5150", I said "what about a 5150? I volunteer at a 8 different psych wards, so am familiar with the term." Well that caused him to call me crazy and a "prohibited person", anyway he is talking to her on g-chat right now trying to break us up. Is this guy too mall ninjaish to be a potential brother in law? What say you?
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