"Oh yeah I'm Special Forces"

[goathead]

im a contractor in afghanistan and we all tell stories. i think most of these guys thought mine were all bs, until a few months back when a few of my old army buddies rotated in and they would here us talking about some of the stuff we did. thats why most of the time i dont say much, and i just listen to other peoples lies, because they arent going to believe my stuff, and i dont really care to try to prove myself. also how do you all get those nice little pictures of all your awards and unit patches and what not when you post? and im not just asking so i can pretend to be a special forces full bird with a ranger tab and diving badge.

we all got it from here http://militarysignatures.com/index....tpage&Itemid=1

[Chachie]

Figured Id throw out my expierence with this type of scum.

Was in Little League, Northwood, Irvine. I was around 11-12years old.

Summed up, was our Coach, had come to practices in all the gear, the suits pilots wear, the shades, the whole nine yards. Actually lived on the old base, somehow got paychecks. Fooled everyone.

Now im pretty sure some of you know what base im talking about, kind of where the 133 toll is in Irvine along the mountains. Where they use to have the Blue Angels.

Anyways this was in the late 80s, and the dude was caught for all this stuff, went on for many years. Needless to say he is still locked up. His " name " to us was Rich Goache, Ill never forget that.

chad

[gotgunz]

All my best stories start out with "One time at band camp.............."

Mine too; perhaps we were separated at birth?

[The Soup Nazi]

I'm part of DASC CO.

Usually that means Direct Air Support Center Company.

However, because we're in such a small and unknown job field (Just as if not more obscure than FACs, TACP, ASE, ASLT, and MMT in the Marine Corps), you might here somebody claim that they're part of Direct Assault Sniper Company.

You would think that as a Marine who can procedurally control aircraft, get attached to the FSCC, see aviation ordnance blow up, and direct close air support, and maybe get a chance to earn your jump wings if you get into ANGLICO you really don't need to exaggerate your job, but alas....

[nick]

Also, his penis has grown four more inches since being in the Army, he tells us HAHA

That does happen, you know. Now, if he were with AF, it shrinks an inch

[nick]

I had another one last night!!! lol
This guy comes in telling me how he was a sniper in the 82nd airborne and went into panama. He sent his 50cal sniper rifle home in three different peices so he could keep it and you only hear a puff from its silencer. I just stared at him starry eyed like I was believing it. In fact I was almost in tears keeping a straight face. "I love to pull it out and see everyones faces, I can hit a gnats *** at 1000 yards... It stands six feet tall with the silencer."
Cause yeah, totally the army is going to miss a weapon. An expensive *** sensitive item like a barret on top of that

Yeah, pity these days they only allow a general buy his sidearm when he retires... Can't have civilians with MILITARY weapons

Yes, I'm bitter

[nick]

I got a somewhat related question to those here who served. Who hasn't told a tall tale about their service? I've met two people like that so far, out of, umm, not sure how many, a few hundred, perhaps. One of them was my grandfather

[Decoligny]

That does happen, you know. Now, if he were with AF, it shrinks an inch

Hell ya, mine did when I joined the AF. But hell, 13 was an unlucky number anyhow so I didn't mind so much.

[Maddog5150]

I got a somewhat related question to those here who served. Who hasn't told a tall tale about their service? I've met two people like that so far, out of, umm, not sure how many, a few hundred, perhaps. One of them was my grandfather

I havent. There is nothing but shame in telling a lie of something your not.

[nick]

I havent. There is nothing but shame in telling a lie of something your not.

Meaning you've never participated in your platoon's BS sessions?

I'm not talking about a 27d talking about being a Green Beret or someone who's never served talking about being a SEAL or at least Marine Recon and carrying a Desert Eagle on each side for balance.

EDIT: Who here had to look up 27d?

[Timberwolf]

I meet alot of former "snipers", "recon", "SpecOps", "SEALS", "SF", "Airborne" yadda yadda yadda at the range where I'm an RO. I'll drop a BS flag every now and then if they're really obnoxious and get on my nerves, otherwise I just marvel at their exploits with a cheser cat grin on my face.

Occassionally if I'm really in a good mood I'll try to goad 'em into a little one on one competition with a 20 shot 100 yard prone dot drill, buck a shot into the pot, first to drop looses the pot. Surprisingly rarely do these special people accept my challenges . . .

[nick]

Occassionally if I'm really in a good mood I'll try to goad 'em into a little one on one competition with a 20 shot 100 yard prone dot drill, buck a shot into the pot, first to drop looses the pot. Surprisingly rarely do these special people accept my challenges . . .

They're only there to shoot, and they don't want to embarrass you. It's your range and all

P.S.: Sorry for flooding this thread, I just find some of the stories here hilarious.

My own experience was somewhat more embarrassing though. My girlfriend and I met a guy claiming to be an ex-SEAL in a very unlikely situation (won't go into details, it may embarrass the guy if he ever reads this). He seemed to be talking the talk, but not being a SEAL (and never having even talked to one other than a few words) I had my doubts, because of the situation we found him in and, well, everyone and his 500lbs grandmother claim to be a SEAL these days. Besides, some of his stories seemed over the top based on my (limited) experience. We helped him out though, and ended up being in touch, if for no other reason but that he didn't have anyone else to talk to. I didn't enjoy that "being in touch" though, for I thought he was lying. Well, I found out that he wasn't... I apologized to him, he said that he understands and that he sensed that I didn't believe him; and he hasn't called me since. He used to call me about once a month or so, it's been about two months.

[Timberwolf]

They're only there to shoot, and they don't want to embarrass you. It's your range and all

God bless 'em for that . . . helpin' me retain my dignity and all . . .

[springy101]

Every person I happen to talk to at gas stations and stuff while waiting in line who says they are ex military around here are always "recon snipers." I'm sure it takes quite a long time to even get considered for the special forces, and then to get the job and retire to a gas station job? That always gets me.

[nick]

Every person I happen to talk to at gas stations and stuff while waiting in line who says they are ex military around here are always "recon snipers." I'm sure it takes quite a long time to even get considered for the special forces, and then to get the job and retire to a gas station job? That always gets me.

What gets me is the "recon snipers" part. What's wrong with being Army snipers?