Handgun for my wife

[Casual_Shooter]

My wife has expressed an interest in a handgun. She has shot my .45, 9mm, .357 and rifles. All were too loud or had too much kick for her (for now). She prefers pistols over revolvers. I've decided a .22 or .380 would be a good first caliber for her. If she decides to upgrade later, the .22 can be passed down to my daughter.

Most likely, she will not be carrying this gun (LTC's in SD are hard to get). But will use it for classes, range time, zombies etc.

I did a search on pink (of course ) .22 and .380 guns to see which she liked the looks of. We will then go to a range to have her shoot them if available. I thought I would post here to see if any of the ladies here have owned/ shot any of the following. I'd like to avoid getting a firearm with known issues.

She has larger v.s. smaller hands.

The options so far in no particular order:

Taurus 738 TCP

Walther P22

Beretta U22 Neos

I have not yet done any research to see if, any, of the above are off-roster.

[BonnieB]

Casual, this is probably the most popular topic in the Women's Forum, besides pink guns.

No offense, but you are about to make the classic mistake of choosing for her. Unanimously, women say DON'T. (One priceless remark was "If you wouldn't send a man to buy you a bra, why would you let him pick your gun?"). It's all about fit, and you can't do that for her.

Here's the important thread on the topic, lots of input from women shooters, of their own experience. http://www.calguns.net/calgunforum/s...d.php?t=357584 But this idea is all over the Womens Forum. Search here for 'wife' or 'girlfriend' and you'll see.

All agree, the best thing for her to do is to go rent some guns without you there. Repeat until she finds one she likes. No, loves. She may surprise you. It happens.

Women here will tell you that the lady in question has to make the choice. If she thinks it's too loud, she hasn't got the right ear protection. Double her up with foamies and ear muffs. If everything has too much kick, she may need her grip adjusted. She should definitely, definitely, go to a Women's Handgun Safety class, by herself, to learn in the company of other women who are just starting out.

If she wants pink, by all means. But she could also shoot classic black. The problem with pink guns is that it limits her choices.

I shoot .380 and .40 cal and .22 for practice. .380 is very expensive for plinking and won't reliably stop an intruder. Not much under 9mm will. She can't protect the family with a .22, and you won't always be there to shoot the .45.

Please browse thru the Women's Forum on this. We've talked this through really well. In fact, if she wants to post on the forum and talk with us directly, we'd love it.

[Casual_Shooter]

Thanks. And yes, I know it's been discussed.

Have you owned any of the guns I linked.

[glockman19]

My wife had the same issues with my guns too...other than the .22...so...I bought her a Bersa Thunder .380.

[whtl]

My wife ended up with three Bersa Thunder's. Bedroom, trunk of car and next to her lounge chair.

[snubbyfan]

When ever we go to the range to practice with our carry guns, we unload a 4" 66-3 and a 442. People always seem to think the larger guns mine but it's my wife that shoots the magnim.

[Casual_Shooter]

My wife had the same issues with my guns too...other than the .22...so...I bought her a Bersa Thunder .380.

My wife ended up with three Bersa Thunder's. Bedroom, trunk of car and next to her lounge chair.

Thanks. A friend bought his girlfriend a Bersa Thunder and she loves it, so that's definitely an option I hadn't thought of.

These were the ones she picked out just from pictures so before I tried to find a range with any of them, I figured I'd see if any of them were lemons and should be crossed off.

I'll add the Bersa to the list.

[movie zombie]

i handled the bersa thunder. didn't like it enough to rent one. just one woman's take.

i echo that your wife needs to handle guns herself.
she then needs to fire guns herself.
she needs to get her HGC.
she needs to be hands on involved.

[Casual_Shooter]

i handled the bersa thunder. didn't like it enough to rent one. just one woman's take.

i echo that your wife needs to handle guns herself.
she then needs to fire guns herself.
she needs to get her HGC.
she needs to be hands on involved.

Understood and thanks for the input on the Bersa.

I'm confused... From a woman's point of view, how more should she be involved at this point? She asked me about options for a .22 caliber semi automatic pink pistol. I said that it was a personal decision but I would show her some examples of styles, sizes etc. She understands things may change 180 degrees once she shoots them. But it would seem there needs to be a starting point more than just "There's the gun case in the range, have at it".

Of the examples I showed her (different pistols and revolvers just so she could get a sense of what was possibly available), she picked the ones I linked as the initial choices that "she liked".

If I learn that the Taurus, for example, is a dud (bad, problematic etc), I won't have to worry about her even handling/ shooting that one.

[SilverTauron]

Understood and thanks for the input on the Bersa.

I'm confused... From a woman's point of view, how more should she be involved at this point? She asked me about options for a .22 caliber semi automatic pink pistol. I said that it was a personal decision but I would show her some examples of styles, sizes etc. She understands things may change 180 degrees once she shoots them. But it would seem there needs to be a starting point more than just "There's the gun case in the range, have at it".

Of the examples I showed her (different pistols and revolvers just so she could get a sense of what was possibly available), she picked the ones I linked as the initial choices that "she liked".

If I learn that the Taurus, for example, is a dud (bad, problematic etc), I won't have to worry about her even handling/ shooting that one.

From my observations on women ive dated, note that this process won't work if she doesn't care about the outcome.

Some people, male and female, could care less about firearms.Picking a firearm is a serious task to undertake, and it cannot be done on her behalf. If she doesn't care enough to be proactive in picking out a firearm without you metaphorically holding a gun to her head, what's going to motivate her to shoot and practice with it?

All firearms are paperweights without a skilled user. Someone who doesn't practice with a firearm is a liability to themselves and those around them, and practice costs time and money. I live in the sticks and it costs $100+ a month for me to maintain some level of defensive ability-and I ain't Rob Leatham either.Pro shooters burn thousands of rounds to get good at shooting.

I understand as a man that you want to get you girl squared away on the subject of personal defense, but ultimately its her life at stake here. She has to be the one to want to do this. If she doesn't , all that's going to happen is you'll have fun gun shopping and the weapon will promptly vanish into a drawer, never to be fired again this decade. If that's how things are going to turn out anyway, you're better off aborting this exercise.

[movie zombie]

i think that i may have misread you: i think you're responding to her request. you're trying to be helpful. however, the most helpful thing i think you can do is to say you've checked around and the consensus is that she needs to be more involved. then point her to the computer. at the end of the day if this is going to be her weapon, it needs to be her weapon of choice and she needs to understand why and what the trade offs are. ok, imo, she needs to understand that......sigh.

take her to as many gun shops as you can. have her handle as many guns as possible. take her to as many ranges as you can and have her fire as many guns as possible. let her know that you really do support her wanting to have a weapon but that you can't do it for her.....that whatever she gets she's going to need to be comfortable with it and go to a range and practice. perhaps even take a class....with or without you.
have her get that HGC!

i get your confusion. i think being clear for yourself first that she needs to be involved...more than asking you to narrow the field down for her. the most important thing you can do for her is to let her know that you support her in this and want to be of help but ultimately you can't do all the work for her.

gun ownership is more than having a gun. its a responsibility. one way of knowing that a gun owner is taking responsibility is that s/he is hands on active in deciding which gun to buy. and then going to the range and practicing with it.

ok, enough of that.

my opinion: skip the .380. there are those that will disagree with me. i find it to be a useless caliber.....there is nothing wrong with starting out with a .22 and working up. in fact, a santa clara county sheriff once told me more people are killed by a .22 than any other caliber...why? probably because it is the most owned and it is the one that most practice with. also, take a look at the resale on the bersa .380. they show up and seem hard to unload when one decides it isn't the caliber of choice.

me? i'm more a revolver woman....but i have a few of those semi-auto pistols. they're fun and i like them. but deep down in my heart i'm a revolver woman and i think my bias shows.

i want to thank you for checking here for our opinon. and especially for perservering and asking more. we're an opinionated group....both the women and men that participate here. but we're giving you our honest experience. what i'm recommending is exactly what i did when i decided to get serious re getting a good self-defense gun: lots of online research, lots of visits to gun shops to handle guns, and then renting lots of guns to see how they actually felt in my hand when i was firing them. it was surprising that what felt good in my hand in the shop was not necessarily what felt good in my hand when i fired it.....

keep the questions coming!

[marcopolo650]

How about a Sig Sauer SP2022 9mm? great price and cheap ammo

[Bugguts]

I hated the Ruger .22 and I hated the Bersa. I have an XD9 sub and a Sig P239 9mm. Taker her out, let her rent guns and let HER be the decision maker. It does no good to buy her a gun she won't like.

[katokat]

Casual - Since you are in San Diego, you might want to visit Iron Sights in Oceanside. They seem to have the largest selection of guns to rent. She can handle several to see what fits her hands best, then rent a couple to narrow down the search. Renting can get expensive, but it's far less than buying one and not liking it.

Another suggestion is to have her attend a Women on Target event. We host one every three months at Lemon Grove gund Club (in Alpine) and run the ladies through pistol, rifle, and shotgun. In pistol, everyone starts out with a .22, but can move up in caliber when they want to. There are usually a couple female mentors (one on one coaches), including me. Next one is in January, and although it's supposedly full, there are always no-shows and she could probably get in if she just shows up. I was working with an older lady last time who absolutely did NOT want to shoot anything but a .22, but after about 20 minutes on the Ruger Mark III .22-45, she tried out my M&P and operated it like a champ.

I actually started out with a .45, and ended up dropping down to a 9 when I started IDPA. I tried out the S&W M&P, Springfield XD, Glock, Beretta, and Sig before settling on the M&P. XD was close. It's really all about the fit in your hand, and I also like the guns that have the least amount of stuff to worry about (safety, decocker, etc).

Remember, the smaller the gun, the more kick, so don't go lightweight. Smaller guns are also less accurate.

[Casual_Shooter]

I hated the Ruger .22 and I hated the Bersa. I have an XD9 sub and a Sig P239 9mm. Taker her out, let her rent guns and let HER be the decision maker. It does no good to buy her a gun she won't like.

I'm still confused by these comments. I didn't say I was buying her a gun. I asked if any of the ladies here had shot any of the guns I linked so that I could let her know if any of the guns she's interested in are worth looking at or not. I suppose I'm guilty of doing initial research for her, but in the end, she'll be shooting, choosing the gun she likes, but we have to start somewhere with a few choices.

As I mentioned above, no sense in her considering the Taurus (for example) if they have quality issues etc.

When we buy a car, we do some research for ones in our price range, have the options we like etc. Then we go visit them in person. If we end up not liking any of the initial choices, we start over.