Question for LEO's

[RANGER295]

Here is a short summary of the situation. During the after school program my 4th son claims another student "hit him in the privates" and he defending himself hit the other student back. My son left a slap mark on the other boy's ribs. My son is being suspended and the other boy has no consequence since he claims my son hit him unprovoked. The school will not confirm that there are any witnesses. My son claimed that his groin was red and painful after the incident but the redness was gone when I picked him up. While the lead after school teacher would not concede that this other boy may have hit my son first, she said she "does not get the fourth grade boys playing and hitting each other in the privates". I asked for clarification and she affirmed there is a problem with fourth grade boys behaving in the manor my son indicated.

I am not done with the school and will be addressing it with the district administration who I have a good working relationship with as I am a veteran teacher at the high school.

My wife is adamant that we file a sexual assault complaint with the sheriff.

I would like a LEO prospective. Is my wife over reacting? Am I allowing my being a teacher to cloud my judgement? I would be happy to give more detail in private. Thank you.

[GizmoSD]

[RickD427]

There's two separate issues going on here:

1) Is whether your son was the aggressor, victim, or mutual combatant in the incident. Establishing which is going to be very pivotal in determining the appropriate course of action. Where there are disputed versions of the events, the statements of witnesses and physical evidence become important. What do you have in both categories?

2) California does not have a crime called "Sexual Assault." There are many crimes which are included in the broad category of sexual assaults. The mere striking of a sexual organ (what I assume you mean by "privates") does not complete the elements for any of them. It's important to know the purpose of the other kid in striking your son. If it was done for the purpose of sexual gratification, then you have a sexual assault. If he did it to cause your son pain, or because he's an ***hole, then there is only a battery, no sexual assault.

POSTSCRIPT - There is a lot of legal significance to the other kid being 9 years of age. In sum, it pretty much places him outside of the purview of the juvenile justice system, and also outta the reach of the Sheriff's Department. Please check out Welfare and Institutions Code sections 602 - 602.1

[RANGER295]

Thank you for your reply. It has helped me convince my wife that involving LE is the wrong approach. I have told my son I am proud of him and will still be perusing a more equitable outcome for my son.

[RANGER295]

There's two separate issues going on here:

1) Is whether your son was the aggressor, victim, or mutual combatant in the incident. Establishing which is going to be very pivotal in determining the appropriate course of action. Where there are disputed versions of the events, the statements of witnesses and physical evidence become important. What do you have in both categories?

2) California does not have a crime called "Sexual Assault." There are many crimes which are included in the broad category of sexual assaults. The mere striking of a sexual organ (what I assume you mean by "privates") does not complete the elements for any of them. It's important to know the purpose of the other kid in striking your son. If it was done for the purpose of sexual gratification, then you have a sexual assault. If he did it to cause your son pain, or because he's an ***hole, then there is only a battery, no sexual assault.

1) Unfortunately it appears the only possible witness was this other kid's best friend. It looks like it is basically a he said he said situation.

2) I really believe it is your final example of a kid being an A-hole. Even if it is technically battery, from my prospective they are 9 year old boys being punks on the soccer field. My issue is more with the one sided way it was handled. If both had been suspended I would not say I agree that someone should be suspended for hitting back but I would at least respect it and not argue the pont. Both of you guys make me feel better that I am not under reacting. They have also helped me calm my wife down a bit. Thank you.

[18sam2011]

Absolutely NOT a police issue.

[RANGER295]

Absolutely NOT a police issue.

Thank you. I agree but I needed some help convincing my wife.

[Spyder]

Nut flicks/cup checks/whatever you want to call them were a common thing when I was growing up. And in plenty of circles of adults.
Not a sexual assault issue, and I also have no problem with the receiver retaliating/defending himself. No different than if someone punched your son.

But... schools don't seem to see it that way.

Maybe take your son to do something fun on his suspension days, talk your wife down, and see if he's interested in enrolling in BJJ classes. And certainly try to get it cleared up at the school as that suspension could follow him for a long time and the truth be very distorted in records.

[johnparjr]

Good for your kid defending himself and as you already said involving LE is not even something I would consider