Divorce and Guns

[spaceburger]

Brass Balls is right about the lawyers only goal is to cash out. DO NOT INITIATE a Restraining Order. It automatically goes both ways and WILL be reviewd by the judge in 30 days. If there is no basis for it you could be in REAL TROUBLE. I will send you a PM, call me. Been there, done that, the court will respect your responsible gun ownership. Don't stress about that. Any marrige over 10 years in Kali is considered long term. If she was always the primary bread winnere...guess what...she owes you support even if you don't have tits. If fact you can be a downright transvestitie in Kali and have it NOT BE an issue in Child Custody. My sister's ex was a f%$^ cross dresser and he got 50/50. So worry not...just do not blow it!

[VeryCoolCat]

If anti-gun politicians have taught us anything. Its that sometimes you need to lie to get everyone on your side.

If she brings up something that you said (the gun shoot yourself thing) that would work completely against you. DENY IT.

You never said it, never heard it. Unless theres more than 1 person who heard you say it. There is no proof, Word against Word.

DO NOT use the defense that they "are against you" because of guns.

Just say you own them in the legality of the law, are mentally competent to use them in a situation and safely keep them stored. Without any evidence to say otherwise, they CANNOT use that against you.


At the end the law usually sides with the wife unless you can find her in some kind of lie and the judge will have to disregard many if not all she said.

Since you do not have a steady income, she will be given priority also.

Don't get a restraining order or anything thereof as she/you can use that as an argument to say that their doing that to cause you grief and distress over no actual fear of endangerment. Then you can say shes lying to the law just to harass you.

[spaceburger]

VeryCoolCat also has good advice. ...it never happened
while it may be too late to deny it again don't worry, you have NO HISTORY of doing it multiple times. One time in the heat of trying to chill things out, you were NEVER Abusive, Voilent, OR MADE ANY THREATS. Repeat the positive...sound like a broken record. Keep hitting the fact that you were the primary parent and a GOOD ONE AT THAT!

[accordingtoome]

sell me all your guns for a $5.00 each and after the smoke clears i will sell them back to you.

[11Z50]

Seriously, if you have a close bud that will do it, give him your guns until this blows over. Don't even let it be an issue.

Remember this: You are entitled to spousal support and you should not feel guilty about getting it. If you have joint custody, she may also owe you child support. There is a computer program in the PRK called "dissomaster" that the court uses. It caused me to pay my ex a buttload of money, so maybe it's a zen thing that your ex will pay you. Take it.

[jerryg1776]

retirement benefits

I had a friend who got divorced and he was the primary breadwinner. His wife received spousal support, child support and half of his retirement benefits since he was the main breadwinner. Also, because she did not have a "career" or employment which offered a retirement plan while his career did offer a retirement plan, she was entitled to a part of his pension when it became available to be drawn.

I am not one to give advice, and do not know your exact situation, but when listing all assets and community property, retirement benefits and pensions may be considered community property in the state of CA.

Check this out and never ever proceed without a divorce attorney. You would not take a knife to a gunfight, so why would you go through a divorce without an attorney. Especialy if she has retained one already!

http://www.pension-evaluators.com/CM/Custom/TOCFAQs.asp

Remember "Community Property State".

[artherd]

But NOW, they'r a problem and potential threat to our child?

Lawyers always go for blood, guarentee your wife just said "oh, yeah, now that you ask he does have guns in the house." and her lawyer said "GREAT, WE CAN USE THAT TO GET HIM!"

ROs are standard attorney practice these days, astonishing and vomit-inducing, but true.

[uglygun]

Strippers, the single life, and worst case scenario, sex dolls are looking better and better as a viable option these days.

I can't recall how many of these stories I have read on the web over the past couple years but it quite literally scares the hell out of me. A prenup would be the easiest thing but man I don't like the context of what it says about 2 people getting married if they both agree to it.

I want to believe marriage and the fact that two people who love eachother can live happily ever after. But I am growing to have a pretty dim view of things these days the more and more I read this crap.

[LCAZES]

Lawyers always go for blood, guarentee your wife just said "oh, yeah, now that you ask he does have guns in the house." and her lawyer said "GREAT, WE CAN USE THAT TO GET HIM!"

ROs are standard attorney practice these days, astonishing and vomit-inducing, but true.

Boy is this a load of BS. Every attorney has his or her own personal style of practice. If you don't like yours, go and get a new one you can work with, and DONT discuss these issues in a public forum.

[artherd]

Boy is this a load of BS. Every attorney has his or her own personal style of practice. If you don't like yours, go and get a new one you can work with, and DONT discuss these issues in a public forum.

You're telling me that:
A: Attorneys really don't 'go for blood' in any conflict they're involved in as a default?

B: Don't include ROs in divorce proceedings as part of the default paperwork?

Please provide evidence to the contrary, because my opinion is based on direct personal experience.

[booknut]

Thanks again guys!

I'm not planning on taking out a restraining order.
I just want the police to know how things are going here at home, in case, she shows up one day trying to take out an RO.

I'm fixing to prepare some documents to prove my version of things, including copies of California's recommendations/regulations regarding firearm storage. It should be easy to show the court how safe I've been with my guns and ammo all these years.
I think I forgot to mention that I have also brought in the Eddie Eagle program to my daughter's elementary school several years ago.
The local P.D. borrowed my Eddie Eagle stuff also.

I am active in local gun clubs and shoots, I've been cleared by more than one state for a Concealed Carry Weapon, and I can document all of my formal firearm training. I like to stress how my training isn't all about shooting at targets, but other things like:when to shoot, when to not shoot, the moral and legal aspects of self-defense, and how to avoid situations where I might need a weapon. I can also show where these courses were taught by active and former law enforcement.

I'm not a Rambo(the Stallone version), I don't look like one, nor do I pretend to be one. I'm fairly clean-cut.

I really don't fear losing my firearms, although I know she might want to try it. I'm pretty sure I can mount a strong defense against any attempt.

As far as my attorney, she's been recommended to me by some people I trust (a couple of whom are divorced dad's too). She knows the system around here and seems reasonable (except for the $300/hr ). She's also the wife of the District Attorney, if that means anything.

We have more mediation to attend later on. Meanwhile, I have to take a day-long class about "Children and Divorce". My wife and I will also be seeing a family counselor next week.
Our daughter will be talking with someone from the court also. I don't know who it is or if we can be present (probably not), but I'll find out more from my attorney this coming week.

After having my girl for the last couple of days, I can tell you that she has a good head on her shoulders and I don't worry about anything she tells the court representative. I've been teaching our daughter about guns, their place in our lives, and why Disney and movies like, "Iron Giant" are completely WRONG about guns (if you haven't seen "Iron Giant", there is a part where the child character tells the robot, "Guns are BAD!". We had a little lecture right after that so my daughter could understand that guns are not bad... it's some of the people and how they use guns that's bad.).

I'm keeping a positive outlook on all this. So far, the court seems to be okay with me having custody of our child. I've got the Veteran's Upward Bound folks telling me they can do all sorts of things to help me get back into College. I've also got an employer who doesn't want to let me go, so hopefully I can pick up more hours as time goes by. They definitely will work with any school schedule I wind up with.

Other than my truck and it's faulty fuel sensor whatchamacallit, and my ever slimming bank account, LIFE'S GRAND!

Oh, and I got my .50BMG reg. card sent off on time!