What to Say to Strangers about Your Rifle Case?

[fairfaxjim]

"It's a guitar, I just use this evil looking gun case to keep gunophobic hippies from f'ing with my guitar."

"No, it's not a guitar, I just happen to resemble David Crosby."

"You need to know this why?"

"If I wanted you to know I would have put a freak'n window in this thing!"

"You're asking the wrong guy the wrong question in the wrong place at the wrong time. You sensing a trend here?"

"It's a firearm. You see there is this little known, rarely used intrinsic right we have as US citizens to keep and bear arms. You are a US citizen, aren't you?"

or my fav,
"It's really none of your g*d****d business

[dfletcher]

Invariably, when I travel with longarms at airports, I get asked while I'm waiting in line, or waiting for the shuttle, what's in the huge case?

They ask what's in it. I've been asked if I was a bass player. They are friendly inquiries.

I'm a pretty cold person. It is not my nature to expound on the contents of my ginormous case.

Any suggestions? I don't look like a guitar player.

ETA: The forum software must have misdirected this post from OT to 2A.

Open your eyes wide, stare straight ahead and in your best Steven Wright monotone say "her name was Susan" ........

[Lead-Thrower]

I would just tell them that there are rifles in the case. Chances are they wont bother you anymore. Of course, if it happens to be a fellow gun nut, you will now have someone worthy of talking to while waiting . Win-win in my book...

[rero360]

When they ask what's in the bag ->

Start putting on gloves and with a straight face say, "Now would be a good time to leave."

Don't really do that...

I would add to that, "you might want to take a deep breath and hold it before I crack the seal." hahaha

[Maestro Pistolero]

In a normal tone of voice, "My firearms. A couple high power rifles and a few handguns." I then explain the laws on traveling with firearms to them if they want.

Hiding in the dark about who we are and what we do is how we got ourselves in to this mess.

My thoughts exactly. If it's a friendly inquiry, use it for an opening. People need to see normal folks with guns as much as possible.

If you're not normal, just grunt and look at your shoes. Or laugh maniacally and then quietly whisper "you really don't want to know", followed by another laugh, etc.

[Al B.]

Case Contents

- Precision paper punching equipment.
- Snacks, its a long flight and they charge for everything these days.
- Newton Trombone (LAPD inside humor).
- The fate of the free world, and now you made me tell you too much...what flight were
you originally booked on?
- Firearms; where are yours? This isn't the "Friendly Skies" anymore you know....
- Trust me, its' best you remain ignorant about the contents....

Of course, if it is a semi-normal traveller, it might afford the opportunity to spark a short conversation. If the flight originates at LAX.....not so much.....

[Chris M]

I always tell them them the truth. It's a rifle or rifles and that I'm going (or coming back from) a hunting trip.

Ditto. I have no problem talking to just about anyone about guns. If they have a problem with guns, then I usually tell them they've got to try shooting at least once, since it's so much fun, and follow up immediately with an invite to the range.
By doing this, I've introduced probably 20 people in the last couple years who had never even touched a gun to at least one or two shooting sports.

[emcon5]

"It is a marital aid".

[Merc1138]

"Excuse me? None of your damn business" the end. Why even bother lying about what's in it, or even telling them? It's none of their business, and them knowing does absolutely no good for you or them. The only people at an airport that need to know what the contents of my luggage is, is TSA, that's it.

[shooting4life]

I would just stare at them without saying anything

[fd15k]

I was asked once "what band am I in".... I said "those are rifles"

[2Bear]

So, for the sake of clarity, based on the OP, we're not talking carry-on, we're really talking about a line at the ticket counter, ultimately ending with a ticket agent, not the TSA Security line. (I suppose "modern" skycaps are tkt agents as well these days, though I don't know you can check firearms at the curb...)

So, the airline wants to know about firearms to label the luggage properly, and then the "luggage" may require inspection by TSA in your presence, and you can use NON-TSA APPROVED locks on this luggage, in other words, secure locks.

I've heard of many folks, esp. film/video/photo folks tossing a potential "firearm", ie: a blank/starter pistol in, just to ensure their right to secure their luggage.

OK... Back to the funny stuff.

[chuckdc]

"Radiation detection equipment"


Then walk off in a hurry.

[CHS]

"Oscillation Over-thruster"

You sir, win

[Meplat]

Open your eyes wide, stare straight ahead and in your best Steven Wright monotone say "her name was Susan" ........

And then trigger the remotely operated vile of dark red colored water to start dripping out the bottom.