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The real story about Army and Beretta...
I don't think the Mr. Army hates Beretta, he just fell out of love when he realized that she’s just an over rated Italian with nice curves but on the heavy side. For a big girl that she is, she is very limited on what she can carry (especially if you compare it to the slim and sexy Austrian with a lot of plastic in her). Her "happy" switch is on a weird place, which is kind of difficult sometimes for Mr. Army to reach with his thumb, which almost always guarantees to have both of them in awkward position. Also unlike most of the modern models nowadays, you cannot attach accessories to Beretta, she prides herself of being an old fashion kind of gal and considers old school to be cool. But what she doesn’t understand is that having those ultra-high output Surefire lights attached to her really brings out her tactical eyes. She still believes that black is the in color, but what she doesn't realize is that FDE is the new black. Mr. Army being a fashionista knows that because in the past 20 years he himself transitioned himself to 3 to 4 uniforms. But I think what took the cake was she can’t “bang” as powerful as Mr. Army’s ex-wife Mrs. 1911, she may only carry seven but boy does she carry big kahoonas!
However, Mr. Army and Beretta stuck together for more than 20+ years, surviving various conflicts all over the world. There where rumored issues with Beretta not performing up to par especially when middle east sand gets into her hole, magazine insertion hole that is. None the less they stuck with each other. And after all these years, I could honestly say that Beretta eventually let herself go. (Mr. Army is partly to be blamed though because of all the high stress and abuse that he gave her, I'm not saying Army is abusive, its just part of his job hazard). But Beretta is just a stubborn lady; she won't listen nor give in to the physical needs of Mr. Army. So I guess he got tired and bored of her, and he started looking at other models. After all, he is a rich dirty old man, so all these models are vying for his money.. Eherm.. I mean loving attention.
But one day Berretta had a wakeup call ( she probably realized that money's about to go out the window) and made a drastic makeover to save her relationship with his partner. She had some liposuction done and cut down some size on the lower part of her body. She had new hair color, coyote brown, with streaks of FDE, and she is now willing to accessorize with those sexy 1913 rails. She even got a new nickname! And hot dang she looks hot and sexy! She also added some new mouth piece, so that Mr. Army can silence her in demand! (Talk about that feature right there, bet that would be handy in most situations ) But sadly at the end Mr. Army just had enough and he decides to divorce her.
Still better love story than Twilight.
I don't think the Mr. Army hates Beretta, he just fell out of love when he realized that she’s just an over rated Italian with nice curves but on the heavy side. For a big girl that she is, she is very limited on what she can carry (especially if you compare it to the slim and sexy Austrian with a lot of plastic in her). Her "happy" switch is on a weird place, which is kind of difficult sometimes for Mr. Army to reach with his thumb, which almost always guarantees to have both of them in awkward position. Also unlike most of the modern models nowadays, you cannot attach accessories to Beretta, she prides herself of being an old fashion kind of gal and considers old school to be cool. But what she doesn’t understand is that having those ultra-high output Surefire lights attached to her really brings out her tactical eyes. She still believes that black is the in color, but what she doesn't realize is that FDE is the new black. Mr. Army being a fashionista knows that because in the past 20 years he himself transitioned himself to 3 to 4 uniforms. But I think what took the cake was she can’t “bang” as powerful as Mr. Army’s ex-wife Mrs. 1911, she may only carry seven but boy does she carry big kahoonas!
However, Mr. Army and Beretta stuck together for more than 20+ years, surviving various conflicts all over the world. There where rumored issues with Beretta not performing up to par especially when middle east sand gets into her hole, magazine insertion hole that is. None the less they stuck with each other. And after all these years, I could honestly say that Beretta eventually let herself go. (Mr. Army is partly to be blamed though because of all the high stress and abuse that he gave her, I'm not saying Army is abusive, its just part of his job hazard). But Beretta is just a stubborn lady; she won't listen nor give in to the physical needs of Mr. Army. So I guess he got tired and bored of her, and he started looking at other models. After all, he is a rich dirty old man, so all these models are vying for his money.. Eherm.. I mean loving attention.
But one day Berretta had a wakeup call ( she probably realized that money's about to go out the window) and made a drastic makeover to save her relationship with his partner. She had some liposuction done and cut down some size on the lower part of her body. She had new hair color, coyote brown, with streaks of FDE, and she is now willing to accessorize with those sexy 1913 rails. She even got a new nickname! And hot dang she looks hot and sexy! She also added some new mouth piece, so that Mr. Army can silence her in demand! (Talk about that feature right there, bet that would be handy in most situations ) But sadly at the end Mr. Army just had enough and he decides to divorce her.
Still better love story than Twilight.
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