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  #41  
Old 06-11-2013, 8:00 PM
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Always be honest & discuss it with her. Do not compare possessions, not good advice. I'd have a hard time with only one firearm...Talk about it.
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  #42  
Old 06-11-2013, 8:01 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GoZoner View Post
You are going to need a safe...
Yup Buy a safe

OH and bigger than you need to hold personal papers,
HER Jewelery and stuff when your on vacations away from the house.

>>>> Misplace the other 3 guns in there for awile
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  #43  
Old 06-11-2013, 8:02 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by zhyla View Post
"For fun!" Is the only honest answer.
Joy in life is a damn good reason.
Life is so very short.
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  #44  
Old 06-11-2013, 8:04 PM
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takes some friendly advice from fxhummel1:

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  #45  
Old 06-11-2013, 8:30 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by California44 View Post
How many pairs of shoes does she have?
Fewer than I have, unfortunately. Never thought I'd say that ...
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  #46  
Old 06-11-2013, 8:34 PM
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I forgot to mention, I wish my friends were more like yours! Giving me guns would make you a true friend!

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  #47  
Old 06-11-2013, 8:48 PM
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Originally Posted by SonofWWIIDI View Post
I forgot to mention, I wish my friends were more like yours! Giving me guns would make you a true friend!

No kidding. It was quite the surprise.
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  #48  
Old 06-11-2013, 8:49 PM
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My wife said to get a new wife.

But if that's not possible, you two will just need to find common ground.

And now for my rant.. How are so many guys so damn afraid of what their wife or girlfriend is going to say? Be upfront and honest and if they don't like it, it is time to part ways. Relationships should not be an excuse for one person to change the other person in to something they aren't or don't want to be. OK, end of rant.
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  #49  
Old 06-11-2013, 9:03 PM
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Where's the guy who let his wife choose his hobby?!?!

If you're the sensitive type and can't stomach the "caveman" routine...

Persuade her to get out and go shooting! With or without you, whatever you thinks best. Sounds like you're a patient guy so shouldn't be a problem, the other side is it's sometimes easier to accept instruction and relax from a non-spouse. Look for a Women On Target class near you and offer that up. Barring all that... ask nicely.
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  #50  
Old 06-11-2013, 9:13 PM
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My dad always pays cash and if my mom asks, he already had this one. He says she can't tell them apart, I agree. Everytime he goes to the gun store it's for "primer or powder". Lol. Even though he's really buying a gun or picking one up.

My wife doesn't mind me buying new guns (lots of them) as long as we can still pay our bills, we can afford it.
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  #51  
Old 06-11-2013, 9:20 PM
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Buy a safe, don't give her the combo.
Problems solved.
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  #52  
Old 06-11-2013, 9:32 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rickterscale View Post
I anticipate some major hesitation on my wife to going from a life of no guns to being so well stocked.
I had a similar, but more extreme situation like yours. After the first decade of of marriage being gunless, I got into it and in seven months, I bought 15 handguns and 26 rifles. She complained twice and each time I told her it's my money, so I could do what I want. Also, I recently took her to Calgun's Women on Target, so now she wants her own gun, especially after a break-in attempt this week.
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  #53  
Old 06-11-2013, 9:46 PM
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Originally Posted by madoka View Post
Also, I recently took her to Calgun's Women on Target, so now she wants her own gun, especially after a break-in attempt this week.
^^^ See? Ready don't lie.

I guess I never really answered the OP of "why need more". Truth is you probably don't "need" more, rather want more.

Maybe though by her experiencing it firsthand she'll have a better insight into the question.
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  #54  
Old 06-11-2013, 9:55 PM
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I would say ask her to show respect for what you want. As long as you are a responsible gun owner, and owning more guns will not put your family in financial or any other jeopardy, there's nothing wrong with it.

Nobody NEEDS more than one functioning item. But a healthy marriage involves respect for what your partner desires. I know it's easier said than done, but a good heart-to-heart talk with her will not hurt.

Good luck OP!
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  #55  
Old 06-11-2013, 9:57 PM
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41 guns in 7 months. Not bad brother! Good for you!

Damn you need a big safe or two or three!

Quote:
Originally Posted by madoka View Post
I had a similar, but more extreme situation like yours. After the first decade of of marriage being gunless, I got into it and in seven months, I bought 15 handguns and 26 rifles. .
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  #56  
Old 06-11-2013, 10:01 PM
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You guys tell your wives when you get a new gun?
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  #57  
Old 06-11-2013, 10:05 PM
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Buy an Evil Black Rifle and film her response.
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  #58  
Old 06-11-2013, 10:11 PM
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Default The "Why do you need".

When someone asks you the question, why do you need anything, depending on how they ask it, they have already made up their minds that you don't need it, kind of like many California Sheriffs when you apply for a CCW permit.

I don't argue with people about what I need, instead I turn the issue around and ask why do they have issues with my happiness?

You have to figure you need to evetually have at least the following.

1. 1 .22 cal pistol
2. 1 .22 caliber rifle(AR pattern)
3. 1 357 magnum revolver.
4. 1 9mm full size handgun
5. 1 45 acp, 1911 preferred.
6. 1 12 guage pump.
7. 1 12 guage semi,
8. 1. AR 15 lower with multiple uppers.
9..1. AR 10 lower with mutliple uppers

Then there is the cowboy guns

1. 45 long colt revolver
2 Stagecoach double barrel
3. Lever action rifle.

Then there are the hunting guns.

1. 12 guage over/under
2. 30/06 bolt
3, 338 Lapua.

And you should tell her that until ammo prices become more reasonable that you won't buy any full autos.

Nicki
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  #59  
Old 06-11-2013, 10:14 PM
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Ask her why she needs so many shoes, purses.
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  #60  
Old 06-11-2013, 10:21 PM
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definitely take her shooting, at least then she "might" catch the same bug.
or
she might be like my wife who enjoys shooting but still doesn't understand why I want more guns

here is how it works at my house:
honey do you mind if I spend $600
- on what
does it matter
-your at a gun store aren't you
yes dear I am and I want to pick up ____
-fine do what you want

definitely don't lie or hide it. she is probably worried about safety. my wife knew I had guns but never knew how many. She really did not like my 870 sitting in the back of the closet. So one day I picked up a simple stack-on gun cabinet and put it in the back of the closet. This made her happy, a safe would be nice but I just don't have the room for it.
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  #61  
Old 06-12-2013, 4:53 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bobby Ricigliano View Post
"Because I am in charge of the securiy in our house".
+1, OP I would go with this one!Good Luck and Congrats!
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  #62  
Old 06-12-2013, 5:24 AM
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Tell her to go make you a sandwich.
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  #63  
Old 06-12-2013, 5:32 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by troysland View Post
Glad my wife married a Marine. Non-issue in our home. When she married me, she married the 2A. If she ever develops an issue, I'll really miss her.
Amen.

Sounds to me like a lot of these guys thought with the wrong head, and married the wrong woman.
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  #64  
Old 06-12-2013, 6:01 AM
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My wife was never a gun person and she used to ask me all of the time, when we first started dating why I always had one with me. We'd go on our dates and I'd have my CCW gun on me. She also asked why I needed RAW's and my answer was always, "Just in case and they're fun".

She asked until the day we decided to go camping with two friends and were assaulted by two men with 9mm handguns. It was her first camping trip with me, where the purpose was for all of us to target shoot. She saw how firing a Bushmaster XM15 with 30 round mags are a great deterent for criminals.

6 months after that incident she had gotten home from work and found a man in our backyard watching her undress through the bedroom window. The only thing he responded to was a .357 magnum that I had bought her.

Those incidents happened about 9 years ago and she doesn't ask why anymore and has gotten used to guns being around. We have two young boys, whom I've been teaching proper firearms handling and safety. She also knows that I'm responsible and we've invested in multiple gun safes and gun vaults to prevent kids from accessing firearms.

Easiest way to get your wife into it is:

- Take her to the range, but start her off with easy guns. My wife loves the AR's, 9mm's, and her S&W 686+ .357. She actually prefers a AR for home defense using Hornady TAP ammo.

- What changed my wife's thoughts was what would have happened in both incidents, if we/she were unarmed. She still talks about how scared she was during the camping incident and the relief she felt, when I grabbed the Bushmaster and fired 30 rds. to defend us.

- Anytime we had guns in our house, we always have had safes. When we bought our first house, the first piece of furniture was a large, quality gun safe. This was especially important after having kids.

- I never lie to my wife about the guns, accessories, or ammo I buy. As the other guys said, they do make good investments and ammo has proven that especially in the last 10 years.

- Find other couples, where the wife enjoys shooting and go out with them on a regular basis. Not just to the range, but have them over for dinner and let the kids play together. Make sure they come across as normal and it helps if they are also successful and don't fit the liberal stereotype. Different races, successful, educated, and family oriented individuals. We hangout with people, where owning guns and shooting regularly are normal.

This is how it's all worked out for me, but it won't fit in everyones circumstances. Good luck OP and hope the info helps.

Last edited by Supertac916; 06-12-2013 at 6:04 AM..
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  #65  
Old 06-12-2013, 7:17 AM
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My wife couldn't care less how many guns I have.. she just knows that it's my hobby and something that makes me happy.

20 guns in the house is just as safe (or dangerous depending on your point of view) as 1 gun in the house depending on how they are secured..

Just like a crazy person with a big knife is more dangerous to society than a normal law abiding person with 200 guns.
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  #66  
Old 06-12-2013, 7:18 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Barbarosa View Post
Tell her to go make you a sandwich.
You forgot to have her take off her shoes first...
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  #67  
Old 06-12-2013, 8:20 AM
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Man I genuinely feel bad for those guys out there who get grief over buying or acquiring new firearms.
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  #68  
Old 06-12-2013, 8:35 AM
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I lay the pipe to my wife real good tell her I love her and after that we agree on everything You should try it, it is a magical win win scenario.
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  #69  
Old 06-12-2013, 8:45 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rickterscale View Post
After spending our entire marriage gun-free (she was always uneasy about having guns in the house with kids), my wife finally relented and consented to getting a gun earlier this year. Purchased a Ruger GP-100
Dude, you don't need permission from your wife to do anything.

Be a man.
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  #70  
Old 06-12-2013, 9:02 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rickterscale View Post
After spending our entire marriage gun-free (she was always uneasy about having guns in the house with kids), my wife finally relented and consented to getting a gun earlier this year. Purchased a Ruger GP-100. And I got the bug. So for father's day I got myself a 9mm Beretta PX4 storm. She was a little less comfortable with that one, asking why if the latter is such a great gun, why do we need to keep the Ruger. Well, I got past that one. Today, a co-worker who is moving offered to give, yes give, me three handguns (I think a 380, a 22 pistol, and some other small handgun). Even though it won't cost anything (other than ppt fees), I anticipate some major hesitation on my wife to going from a life of no guns to being so well stocked. I don't need this many guns, but I certainly want them!! So help a brother out and give me some ideas for answering the wife's question and getting her on board.
You've got 50 replies here, 3 are useful. I'm gonna answer this seriously, and hope it doesn't get buried in the thread.

I'm in a similar situation, with an anti-gun wife who tolerates it to some degree. She has the same objections. Kids, safety, the like. So I know what doesn't work, and what sometimes works (nothing will ALWAYS work).

So here is what you can do:

#1. "Honey, we don't need them."
#2. "Honey, unlike the previous firearms, these are being given to us, so it means we are not spending our financial resources on these guns."
#3. "Honey, these guns will not nor ever enter our house. They will be kept out of the house"

(yes you have to make good on this)

3.1 - "honey, this means I will buy a safe for these and keep it in the garage. If and when they get used, the guns go from the garage out, cleaned in the garage, and back in the locked safe. Won't be in a rinky-dink cabinet a kid could open with a screwdriver, but a real SAFE."

yes, you have to follow through on that, even if you have a small safe in the house. And if she relents, you do not inconvenience her in any way when you get this all set up. You pay for the safe out of pocket. You haul home by yourself. you bolt by yourself. Seamless and transparent to her.

next, a sentrysafe wont cut it. You can get the pistol safes from home depot for $100, but I'd recommend getting a rifle size safe for $300-$400 cause you never know. Do not install in a way that she has to see it every time she pulls her car into the garage.

You DO NOT volunteer information like the safe combo to her unless she asks. If she relents, you silently make it happen. She's an anti, so she doesn't want to hear it. Therefore, you accommodate her by not putting it in her face. If she really wants to see what's its all about and go with you to the range, SHE will tell YOU.

If she really is against the guns, she wont want to be involved with them at any time anyways. She wont ask for the combo, she wont ask to see what you ppt'ed, she'll be a see-no-evil hear-no-evil gal. And you play the part too. And that includes future purchases seeing as you have home defense covered.

I don't care what inane opinions the other calgunners have with respect to acquisition of guns, storage of guns, and how they appreciate their hobby as it relates to family life. I didn't pick my wife because of 2A issues. I didn't pick the state I wanted to live in because of 2A issues either.
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  #71  
Old 06-12-2013, 9:06 AM
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I also suggest, don't lie, and don't hide. I bought a flintlock without telling her. It's not a "firearm", right? no dros, ship right to the house, no SN, come on, it's not the same as buying a gun, right?

Not to her. So do you due dilligence. She doesnt have to like it, she doesnt have to be happy to tolerate it. as long as you do your part.
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  #72  
Old 06-12-2013, 9:14 AM
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Another practical reason is having varying calibers for ammo availability.
Also being able to provide someone with protection other then yourself should things ever go sour. Obviously firearms hold value. She can sell them when you die. Having different firearms is more fun when you go out shooting, multiple people can be shooting at once or learning what kind of firearms they like the most.
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Old 06-12-2013, 9:24 AM
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Whiterabbit - Good reply. Thanks.
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  #74  
Old 06-12-2013, 9:33 AM
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I hope it will be of use.

Note I make no suggestions about a practical answer as to WHY you need them. She doesn't care. Police for protection, everything else is a safety concern. Do not argue that, it leads nowhere. Your goal is get the guns onsite, any reasoning is acceptable, any argument that does not help you directly is to be discarded. Any argument that helps you indirectly does not help you at all and should be discarded.

Guns are fun, they are practical, they are a hobby, they are a tool. useless arguments. Address HER CONCERNS:

-They expose your children to lead.
-Your kids are statistically likely to kill themselves by having the gun onsite.
-You are going to accidentally shoot yourself in the face.
-You are gonna die of lead poisoning.
-You are gonna get angry and shoot her during a fight.
Fix THESE notions, and you are more likely to get her tolerance to bring them onsite (you will not get her acceptance. That's OK).

Stay administrative, not technical. "honey, I'll only buy fmj ammo, no lead is exposed". Useless argument. "Honey, I'm gonna rent a storage locker at Reeds and the guns will never even be within a mile of our house". That's a powerful argument, albeit expensive and unacceptable for me personally. We agreed that the garage was an acceptable compromise.

It makes no difference that her concerns are absurd. But "fun", "defense", and "hobby" are complete red herrings. Useless to bring up.

Last edited by Whiterabbit; 06-12-2013 at 9:40 AM..
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  #75  
Old 06-12-2013, 9:33 AM
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FYI I tell my wife I am happy she doesn't like my hobbies. can you imagine having to feed TWO people's worth of shooting?
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  #76  
Old 06-12-2013, 9:37 AM
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I never realized I was supposed to even tell my wife when I bought a gun or was gifted a gun. I have a few large safes and just add to the pile as desired.

I think we have enough respect and trust in each other to not second guess the purchases we make or the safety of the ranch and our children.

If the OP is receiving a gift and not spending any money I can't imagine an argument a woman could really make if they already have a gun in the house. If anything, he would be adding to their worth.
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  #77  
Old 06-12-2013, 9:38 AM
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Here is what worked for me when my wife asked why I needed another gun.
I asker her if she" had jewelry" and she said yes.
Then I asked her if she "wanted more Jewelry" and she said yes.
Then I asked her why she needed more jewelry because she already had jewelry.
She though about it for a second and said " go buy the gun"
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  #78  
Old 06-12-2013, 11:21 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopalong View Post
Amen.

Sounds to me like a lot of these guys thought with the wrong head, and married the wrong woman.
Yep. Not only does my fiance not mind me having guns, she buys them for me as gifts.
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  #79  
Old 06-12-2013, 11:25 AM
Divernhunter Divernhunter is offline
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"Cave man" attitude? Not hardly. I just will not give up my values I have had all my life for anyone. I have had firearms since I was a kid. I have never been into trouble with or without them,excluding traffic tickets.

I have always treated the females in my life very well. Some say I spoiled my girlfriends/ wives and my daughter too much. I do not think so. I give them everything I can including my love and attention. I will not go into debt for my firearm hobby/scuba hobby or when I had my hot rod/race car. But I have gone deeply in debt for my wife and daughter as well as my wife's 2 daughters from a former marriage. I bought my wife far more in jewerly than I bought in firearms. She did as she pleased with the house with few restrictions. I did want the garage. I also shared one room with her for guns/sewing/computer.

Cave man? I think not. I just will not toss out my values/morals or manhood for anyone. I will not cower to a wife and at the same time I do not expect her to cower to me. IF our values clash so much neither is happy it is time to part....Preferably before we get to marriage.
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  #80  
Old 06-12-2013, 12:18 PM
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Altahick Altahick is offline
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only one thing you can do... buy her off lol
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