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Ladies Forum A place for our female Calgunners to discuss, share and interact without the 'excess attention' sometimes found in online forums.

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  #1  
Old 08-22-2012, 6:33 PM
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Default Have you ever met up with a Calgunner you didn't know?

Ladies

Have any of you met up with one of the Calguns.net guys alone when you didn't know them? If you weren't CC, would you feel safe? (I'm not CCL yet...)

I'm meeting up with a Calgunner next week, at an outdoor gunrange I have been to before. I only know the guy on Calguns.net, but he seems reliable.

I'm planning to park directly in front and ask the owner to watch me get in my car when I'm done.

I'm a little jumpy, should I go with my gut and cancel? I really do need new friends to shoot with.
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  #2  
Old 08-22-2012, 6:48 PM
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I've not set up a meet with someone, but I've run into several at South Bay Rod and Gun Club.
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  #3  
Old 08-22-2012, 7:32 PM
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Cutting off foreign aid to EVERY country and dismantling the police/surveillance state!

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  #4  
Old 08-22-2012, 7:36 PM
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Who is he, BonnieB?

If you'd rather PM me the answer, please do!

I've shot with a few male CGNers. Most of them have been terrific shooters and perfect gentlemen. The only one to disappoint talked about on the way to and from the shooting range how unhappy he was with his wife. Then while dropping me off, he propositioned me. Was not expecting that and really had no interest. So I told how important marriage is and whatever unhappiness he had could be worked out. Only wished afterwards he had had the sense and the courtesy to PM to apologize for his gaucheness.
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  #5  
Old 08-22-2012, 7:46 PM
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go with your gut and cancel.

ask the range officer for suggestions on how to meet shooters.

sign up for a class or classes.

be ok with going alone.

but always always always trust your gut.
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  #6  
Old 08-22-2012, 7:49 PM
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Never had a problem meeting other Calgunners. Sure at the time I wished I was CCWing (I am about 5'7, 155lbs) but never had a negative meeting.
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  #7  
Old 08-22-2012, 7:52 PM
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are you female, Josh? we walk in a different world. women meeting up with men we don't really know other than online is one of those things we're taught not to do in self-defense classes.
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  #8  
Old 08-22-2012, 7:58 PM
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If he sketches you out for some reason, don't meet up... Your subconscious is often correct (Gavin de Becker's "Gift of Fear" is an excellent read on how people often don't notice subliminal warning signs, but their subconscious feels something is off. He's got some controversial opinions on women who stay in domestic violence situations though.)

If, on the other hand, you're nervous because this is the first time you've met someone in person you previously met online, your precautions are probably sufficient. Is the range reasonably popular on weekends? There will be people around while you're at the range itself, so as long as the parking lot is relatively busy, you won't be alone with him.

I've met several Calgunners in person whom I'd only known from here (primarily to purchase guns, but I've also gone to their apartments to pick up ammo etc.) and it has worked out fine. But I've probably never met this particular Calgunner.
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  #9  
Old 08-22-2012, 8:03 PM
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I have met with calgunners all the time and people from other forums as well. Never had a problem. But if your not comfortable with it I would cancel before you have an anxiety attack.

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  #10  
Old 08-23-2012, 6:18 AM
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I'm with everyone else, if you're gut is telling you "no" it's probably a wise choice to back out. Perhaps, you could meet on more neutral ground a few days before going to the range, like at a coffee shop?
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  #11  
Old 08-23-2012, 6:34 AM
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I've had several female calgunners come to my home to attend build parties. They didn't know anyone before showing up.

Quote:
Originally Posted by masameet View Post
Who is he, BonnieB?

If you'd rather PM me the answer, please do!

I've shot with a few male CGNers. Most of them have been terrific shooters and perfect gentlemen. The only one to disappoint talked about on the way to and from the shooting range how unhappy he was with his wife. Then while dropping me off, he propositioned me. Was not expecting that and really had no interest. So I told how important marriage is and whatever unhappiness he had could be worked out. Only wished afterwards he had had the sense and the courtesy to PM to apologize for his gaucheness.
Hell, you once rode alone several hours from your home to spend a long weekend with a few male calgunners you had never met. I'd post the pictures but, you asked me not to.

BonnieB,

you should take masameet up on her offer and PM her. She has a very level head and would give you good advise.
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Last edited by CSACANNONEER; 08-23-2012 at 6:37 AM..
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  #12  
Old 08-23-2012, 9:22 AM
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Heh, oops then. I don't go into different forums I just use the new posts link. I got it... you could always bring a friend I suppose.

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Originally Posted by movie zombie View Post
are you female, Josh? we walk in a different world. women meeting up with men we don't really know other than online is one of those things we're taught not to do in self-defense classes.
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  #13  
Old 08-23-2012, 11:42 AM
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I have several times, always either in a public place or with plenty of witnesses around...

I have also been to csa's house several times for build parties and other events most of the time he is fine, except there was this one time at band camp...

you masy feel more comfortable meeting people at a group/ social function. we just got a new C3 in the bay area so there should be some events soon.
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  #14  
Old 08-23-2012, 11:59 AM
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Bring a friend with you, I have met up at ranges with about 8 Calgunners so far, always good experiences. And next week I am gonna go shoot with another one.
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  #15  
Old 08-23-2012, 12:26 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BonnieB View Post
Ladies

Have any of you met up with one of the Calguns.net guys alone when you didn't know them? If you weren't CC, would you feel safe? (I'm not CCL yet...)

I'm meeting up with a Calgunner next week, at an outdoor gunrange I have been to before. I only know the guy on Calguns.net, but he seems reliable.

I'm planning to park directly in front and ask the owner to watch me get in my car when I'm done.

I'm a little jumpy, should I go with my gut and cancel? I really do need new friends to shoot with.
if your gut tells you to cancel, then do so.

also, we have monthly shoots here on CGN. check with your area subforum or your C3 that sets up the shoots in the area you live in. plenty of people go to those shoots, and you will probably find a lady friend that is married or GF to one of the other CGN'ers who might want the same thing as you.
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Old 08-23-2012, 1:31 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lyte- View Post
I have several times, always either in a public place or with plenty of witnesses around...
Why I'm posting in this sub-forum, I don't know - but the last post indicator showed this, and I immediately thought of the time we met up to make sure we were cool with driving up to the Central Valley build party. I was going to suggest this:

Quote:
Originally Posted by bob7122 View Post
also, we have monthly shoots here on CGN. check with your area subforum or your C3 that sets up the shoots in the area you live in.
So I second that; there will be plenty of other Calgunners around, meaning there will be an opportunity to hang out/chat with others (who are also there to meet fellow Calgunners, rather than just to shoot on their own) in case your primary contact gets kind of awkward.

Stay safe!
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Old 08-23-2012, 3:06 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lyte- View Post
I have several times, always either in a public place or with plenty of witnesses around...

I have also been to csa's house several times for build parties and other events most of the time he is fine, except there was this one time at band camp...

you masy feel more comfortable meeting people at a group/ social function. we just got a new C3 in the bay area so there should be some events soon.
I think I still have the bottle of lube you left last time you were up here. I'll just save it for your next visit, OK?









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  #18  
Old 08-23-2012, 3:14 PM
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What exactly do you think he's going to do to you at an outdoor gun range....
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Old 08-23-2012, 3:24 PM
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I'm not female. Even still, I would exercise caution and awareness in any public place, whether you're meeting someone or not. I don't know if you should treat this any differently. It also depends on the context -- online 'friend' or were you referred to a known instructor here? Craigslist meets, forum meets, Match.com, by yourself in public, or whatever --- be aware and cautious.

That being said, I think it would be one stupid person to attack someone else at a gun range where everybody is likely armed.
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Old 08-23-2012, 5:46 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by scottschoe View Post
What exactly do you think he's going to do to you at an outdoor gun range....
Quote:
Originally Posted by konata88 View Post
I'm not female. Even still, I would exercise caution and awareness in any public place, whether you're meeting someone or not. I don't know if you should treat this any differently. It also depends on the context -- online 'friend' or were you referred to a known instructor here? Craigslist meets, forum meets, Match.com, by yourself in public, or whatever --- be aware and cautious.

That being said, I think it would be one stupid person to attack someone else at a gun range where everybody is likely armed.
it is not the range she would be worried about, it is the distance to her car and all those spots where a man can overpower a woman and hide the fact that something bad is occuring. for example the rapists that attack women at a college campus.- read where they are attacked and how quickly it happens.
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  #21  
Old 08-23-2012, 5:47 PM
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Sold a couple of items where the person met me at the house. No biggie and Im not that paranoid to feel like I need to be armed. Just realized this was the womens forum- damn new posts link lol) If you dont feel comfortable, go with a friend or dont go.
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Old 08-23-2012, 6:36 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bob7122 View Post
it is not the range she would be worried about, it is the distance to her car and all those spots where a man can overpower a woman and hide the fact that something bad is occuring. for example the rapists that attack women at a college campus.- read where they are attacked and how quickly it happens.
I guess my suggestions remains the same. Be aware and cautious where ever you are. Be aware and cautious when ever; whether you're alone or meeting someone for the first time.

Doesn't matter if you're a Calgunner or a GlockTalker.

And I still maintain that anyone who would commit any crime - assault, robbery, theft, whatever - at a gun range is incredibly stupid. If you're going to commit a crime, there are less risky places to do so than someplace where everyone is likely armed.
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Old 08-23-2012, 6:46 PM
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  #24  
Old 08-23-2012, 6:53 PM
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All the CalGunners I've met are gtg in my book.
Not a tweek or rip off in in the bunch that seem like old friends.
-g
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Old 08-23-2012, 7:32 PM
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Word. I threw a build party and everyone was gtg. Nobody tried to rape my GF or myself. A good day.
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Old 08-23-2012, 7:43 PM
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I'm Good to go I have puppy's and candy in the back of the van...
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Old 08-23-2012, 7:44 PM
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I agree with bringing a friend. Especially for the women. Just too many crazies out there, you never know.
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  #28  
Old 08-26-2012, 12:13 PM
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Which range are you going to? At Sac Valley the parking is right in front and they're usually very busy. I wouldn't think anyone would try anything at all. I've only been to the Cordova range once, but as I remember the parking area wasn't remote or hidden at the least either. That said, listen to your gut. If it's not feeling right then don't go, it could be nothing, but then again it could be something.
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Old 08-26-2012, 1:06 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by movie zombie View Post
go with your gut and cancel.

ask the range officer for suggestions on how to meet shooters.

sign up for a class or classes.

be ok with going alone.

but always always always trust your gut.
100% agree! You are under NO obligation just because you kno that person from calguns! i personally say that posting online not 'knowing' someone.

i have met 2 people from calguns in real life. one was really sweet , and one was really weird...just because he knew who i was because of my pink AR thread but i did not kno who he was.... he basically stared like a psycho... when he finally introduced himself, me and my gf were all freaked out. so sorry if i seemed 'stuck up' as i was pm'd but you don't really 'know' me...we just post together!!
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Old 08-26-2012, 1:54 PM
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On my original account, I got bugged by a few guys on here, and it got scary with one guy...agreed not to blast him, if he stopped messaging me acting so friendly, cause I didn't know him. Kept trying to get me to go to the range with him, wanted to get dinner, or something to eat, wanting to get coffee, I was like ummm I am not interested lol.

Made a new account, have had no issues further. I'll meet other gals at the range maybe after, get a bite to eat, just hang out, talk. But with random guys on here? No thanks...to much chance for creepers/stalkers. Besides from what I've observed many single guys on here may try to date from off here lol.

I mean if thats your thing, whatever, just not open to that. On my original account, to many ppl would message me and try to get me to meet up, it felt really suffocating. And I stopped adding ppl to FB, since that yielded my real name, and photos of me, and lets face it, guys mostly ime look first, stare, talk/ask q's later...
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Old 08-28-2012, 3:06 AM
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I'm not a female, but my suggestion to meet good up and up calgunners would be to participate in one of the occasion pro-2A meetings or a local get together.

I went to one of the Sunnyvale pack the room events when we were fighting against their attack on FFLs, and the meet up at the Firehouse bar & grill afterwards. I went to a get together at Oaklander's house once. I also met up with the 707 crowd when a meet up for drinks was thrown together. All were a lot of fun and I could have easily made plans with people to go to the range some other time out of it.

There's lots of other people around, you're already at a place where you're going to be talking to each other so you can get a better vibe on people, and the people more likely to go to those would be the reliable and safe type to hang with. That's my opinion anyways, for what it's worth. You'll have a lot more information than just what you know from some forum posts at least.

The problem of not having enough friends to shoot with isn't just a girl problem by the way. I have a friend I go with sometimes, but I work in SF and most of the people there are anti's, so my attempts to get work buddies to go don't usually work. Worked once, but he just left the company a few weeks ago. I haven't tried PM'ing people here, cause I assumed that would come off as way too creepy. Maybe I should take my own advice
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  #32  
Old 08-28-2012, 8:34 PM
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Ah, kick him in the nuts if he misbehaves?

I learn pretty quick so two or three kicks usually does it for me.



Guns, knives and martial arts are all best used for self defense. Learn to kick some *** and you'll be fine.

I'll tell anyone who asks that I would love to see every woman packing a .22lr in her purse. It would be a great practical deterrent because a crook would never know when he's targeting a well armed person. (this isn't to say women need to carry purses or limit themselves to a .22, it just wouldn't print which means the crooks would never know)

Any way, if you're too scared of the guy tomorrow, I'll be at the Metcalf range at lunch time and it should be good for a few chuckles. Double up your ear protection because it should be LOUD!
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Old 08-30-2012, 3:14 PM
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I have no problem going to the range, the friends I've had all my life, and also brought into it by school, and work etc? I shoot with all the time. We ride bikes, some of us stunt, we do car cruises. We do build parties for cars, bikes, fire arms. We talk about movies, movie nights, we go to the range, we also go to a few friends props in TX, CO, and a few places and run and gun. 95% of our group is EX Mil Gals, or current LEO, so its not like we sit around painting nails and eat smores lol.

Our group is pretty tight, and though many have moved to other states, in CA alone we have a 57 member count, we are throwing a cruise for the weekend, rice rockets, hot rods, euro cake machines, bikes. Then meeting up for some shooting, and BBQ. Some have BF's or spouses, so they are bringing them, some are bringing kids. We shoot, gym, ride, drive, etc together.

We've done a few random range days sheer in the moment, and its kind of annoying for guys to stand around, waiting for you to stop, so they can try to initiate a convo, when you do polite responses, and get back to focusing, they want to open dialog further...even if you reply plainly you aren't interested, some guys think its a game lol, that they should persist further...

Last week was shooting, met a nice gal who was teaching her new husband how to shoot, she's ex army, hes never touched a gun in his life, he giggled after he popped off a 9. Invited her to this weekends festivities. We are a small group of nation wide having a large number of members, most like myself will converge on SO CAL, during holidays and events.

I'm fine meeting up with random ppl if I feel like it, just don't like some guys I run into at the range...

As for a 22 in a purse? Uhh, the smallest I'll go is 9mm HST or Gold Dot, testing phases of Underwood right now and a few other rounds, but just using what work gives me atm.
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  #34  
Old 08-30-2012, 8:59 PM
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Go with your gut. Meeting someone from online to me is no different than meeting someone at a grocery store or anywhere else.
In fact often you have more knowledge of them if you've been talking online than you do when you meet them somewhere in person first (people can lie in person or online so no changes there).

At the very least, this guy will know you have guns and know how to use them. That's usually a pretty good deterent.

If you're really nervous, take the advice from others: bring a friend or cancel.

Just follow the commen sense rules if concerned. Be in public areas with people around, light (outdoor range so should be daylight and you're g2g). That kind of thing.

Have fun shooting and stay safe.
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Old 08-31-2012, 12:13 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DiscoBayJoe View Post
Thanks for tonight's nightmare.
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  #36  
Old 09-02-2012, 7:45 AM
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What a ridiculous thread.

How's it different than meeting anyone else online? Seriously? Most grown up adults have a sense when they make a choice when they agree to meet someone online as to what the person is about.

Did you agree to meet up with the (male, I presume) Calgunner and are now having second thoughts without any additional input on his part? What changed?

That would make you disingenuous, flighty, insecure, wishy washy or flakey. Why'd you agree to show up in the first place? Please tell us what changed specifically from the time you agreed to meet until now. If you want references on a Calgunner, it's entirely fair to ask in that regard.

The idea that "we walk a different walk" is entirely ridiculous and fear mongering, and it perpetuates several male stereotypes that I'd rather not even get into. If you felt like bringing company, which I heartily endorse, you should have done so in the first place. Surprises like that are rude to the other person.

I'm sure the person you agreed to meet is a nice person.

If I were the person that kindly offered you shooting time / lessons / company and I saw this thread, I'd feel violated that you aired some discomfort in public without sharing that discomfort with me at first, giving me an opportunity to bring you comfort or else, and I'd consider that, and you, creepy. I'd cancel hanging out with you in the first place.

The women in the house, while I'm sure can speak for themselves, would likely agree. If you want to learn to shoot or spend time at the range, and the "male" component somehow inconveniences you or makes you "scared", there are plenty of women around that are happy to shoot with you without men being part of your group or the "gender tension" crap being an issue.
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  #37  
Old 09-02-2012, 8:12 AM
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I don't think I've been shooting with any cal gunner, male or female. If you see a guy, about 5'9 and white, who says "woot woot!" When he makes a good shot, that is me.
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  #38  
Old 09-02-2012, 8:26 AM
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Quote:
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What a ridiculous thread. .........
so many times the use of" ridiculous" in one response to one woman's post in the Ladies Forum.

talk about ridiculous.........
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  #39  
Old 09-02-2012, 11:58 AM
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FUD without any cause is, in fact, ridiculous.

I have met hundreds of CalGunners at this point and other than one guy who was a little grumpy, I have had all A+ experiences.

What I see is a lot of FUD for absolutely no reason whatsoever. The OP gave no reason to be afraid, she created a construct of complete distrust and is treating some poor unsuspecting bloke like a criminal. How it would feel if someone told a shop owner to watch YOU because YOU were not trusted. I mean seriously. If you are so afraid of the Boogie Man, you shouldn't be setting up meets with people in the first place.
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  #40  
Old 09-02-2012, 12:05 PM
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What's the point? If you want to meet people go by yourself and be open to saying "hello" to people, it should turn out good.

Triple
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