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Ladies Forum A place for our female Calgunners to discuss, share and interact without the 'excess attention' sometimes found in online forums. |
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HD handgun suggestions for my wife
Talk about perfect timing with the opening of the ladies section...
Recently my wife has come to the realization that she needs to learn how to use the most effective tools for defending home and kids when I'm not there. Funny enough, it was because of a dream she had where she was forced to do just that...with a gun. So, now she wants to learn how to properly use a handgun for home defense and I need suggestions from other female shooters of what may fit my wife best. Things to keep in mind: -she IS NOT a gun gal by any means -she's only willing to learn/use a gun out of percieved necessity, not out of a passion for them -from taking her shooting one time...a loooooooong time ago...she gets "jumpy" over the gun's bang...like she gets startled every time a gun fires -to give you some idea of her hand size, she's about 5' 5" tall What would the ladies here suggest we look at? There is no preference for an auto or a revolver since she has never owned a gun before(unless you count half ownership of my collection) Thanks for any help, and I really do need the help. I'm a big bore guy myself. I only have 2 handguns, one in .45ACP and one in .50AE so I don't think either of those will fit her.
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Last edited by soopafly; 09-12-2008 at 5:36 PM.. Reason: forgot to add... |
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I'm not a lady, but I happen to be married to one.
Have you tried taking her to a range that rents guns? Let her try a few and see what she likes? |
#3
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I happen to own both a pistol and revolver. My pistol is an SA XD subcompact 9mm. My revolver is an old Smith and Wesson 4" .38. The pros to the pistol is that it holds 10 rounds and is easy to reload in the dark. I also have the laser/flashlight attachment for shooting in the dark. The problem I have with it is field stripping it to clean it. The lever that allows me to take the slide off is very difficult to move, and I know its silly, but I broke a nail trying to clean my gun. I've also tried to pull the slide back with and without nails, and it's a little harder with nails. My revolver however, is easy to shoot and clean. I just use a little screwdriver to remove the cylinder. The drawback to that is it only holds 6 rounds, I need a flashlight if I have to use it in the dark and it's difficult to reload in the dark.
The biggest thing I learned to shoot was a .22 rifle before I went into the Army. I was not really crazy about shooting M16's and handguns during basic and AIT, but it was do it or fail, so I just did it. Just to let you know, I qualified with the M1911A2 and the M9. I prefer the 1911. I bought the SA because it's small and it really does fit well in my purse, so we really really need to get shall issue in here so that we can carry legally.
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"This we'll defend"- U.S. Army Motto "I declare to you that woman must not depend upon the protection of man, but must be taught to protect herself, and there I take my stand." --Susan B. Anthony (1820-1906), speech in San Franscisco, July 1871 NRA Life Member Last edited by Annie Oakley; 09-12-2008 at 7:11 PM.. |
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I am not a lady either but I am married to one too. Out of all the guns that I have, the wife picked the H&K P2000, it said it felt good because she has small hands. Don't know if that helps any.
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#6
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L
My wife started like the rest of us......a 22. Got used to not flinching ..not blinking...sight pic...control.. and so on. Then she commandeered one of my 357's....guess which one! Hint: Starts with a P....so be on your toes and hide the good stuff.
22's are the best starter guns |
#7
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Well it sound to me like she will keep it at the house and only as a HD gun...So that tells me you should get her a full size gun. This might be a little heavier, but at the same time, the weight will reduce the recoil for her due to it being "absorbed" if you will with the slide being longer and bigger. (i.e. its less recoil for me to shoot a 5 inch 1911 than a 4 inch XD, cause 1. its a longer barrel, but 2...its all metal and that reduces the recoil for me)
Bigger isn't always better....ballisticlly the difference between 9mm, 40 S&W and 45 ACP isn't THAT much....being as a 9mm has less "percieved" recoil...I'd go with that. Its also harder to learn to shoot a DA/SA gun like a sig than a DA only gun like a glock, XD, or S&W MP. Its difficult cause the first pull on a sig is long and hard, and the following are short and easy. Plus Sig doesn't have any built in safety mechanisums like the previously mentioned guns. Since she doesn't sound like much practice will be put into shooting, go with one of the guns I mentioned As far as cleaning goes, I have never cleaned a Glock or S&W M&P, only my sig and an XD before and BOTH were super easy to clean. In regards to her shaking with the recoil....LOTS of people do that, its fairly common. Our bodies are made up of mostly water, so the sound and explosion actually reverberates in our bodies a little bit (that's what I was told at least) but the only way she will stop jumping around guns...is more shooting. Also something that I WISH I had on my pistol is a rail like annie said and I highly reccomend that as well. When it comes down to it....she will be more accurate with it cause withing the flashlight spot on the bad guy that is where her bullet will go, and thats pretty easy to remember even when you have tons of adrenaline in your blood....she isn't trying to put 2 in the chest and 1 square between the eyes....just trying to stop the threat....So I would recommend that. So I would recomend : -Full sized or 5 inch Springfield XD 9mm (they also designed the grip to be ergonomically easier for a new shooter to pic up and shoot, plus they have a trigger safety, grip safety and I think they just came out with a thumb safety but IDK if its CA Legal or not) -Full size Smith and Wesson M&P 9mm (oh btw this has interchangable grips, so if she has big or small hands you can change them accordingly...forgot to mention that) -a full size Glock 9mm (I think its a Glock 17, not sure) whatever you choose, be sure to check out all the options and have her shoot all three of them and then have her decided which one she likes best. I hope this helps! Also there are LOTS of great guns out there...but these are the ones I would most likely pic if I wasn't into guns, but its also just my opinion.
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Last edited by shellyzsweet; 09-12-2008 at 10:02 PM.. |
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Not a lady either but I have some observations. If you start with a .22 (rental?) and work up she can probably handle a lot more gun than you think. Jeff Cooper always said that any woman could handle a 1911 just fine, and if she really couldn't,t "get her a .22 and tell her to shoot for the eyes". Cooper's words, not mine. I think anyone, male or female, who does not have an affinity for shooting and just wants to learn and practice enough to be competent should stick to a revolver. Much more straight forward and intuitive, not as many bells and whistles to become confused about in times of stress. It's not likely she will need more than 6 shots. For many of these same reasons I find myself carrying my .357 most of the time. Quick but sure shot placement and one shot stops is more my style than spray and pray. .38 special may be all she wants to deal with, but you never know, she might get to liking the punch of a .357? The .38 special with proper loads is a good fight stopper. I have small hands for a man, grip selection can go a long way toward getting a good fit. A S&W ladysmith is a gun I would look into.
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Take not lightly liberty To have it you must live it And like love, don't you see To keep it you must give it "I will talk with you no more. I will go now, and fight you." (Red Cloud) |
#9
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My first handgun I shot as a young kid was a SW .357 magnum. No problem.
My wife's first time with handguns were a couple of my .45ACPs. No problem. However she personally likes some of the newer compact models in 9mm as ergonomically they fit her hands better in a way she is more confident of. On another point - I tell everyone new to shooting that having a device exploding in your hands a couple feet from your face is simply not natural. So it is normal that you will at first reject this and functionally attempt to avoid it everytime you pull the trigger. So it's okay. The point is learning what you are doing, like flinching or too tight of a grip, and overcoming it. It can be frustrating for some people, but once they get over it a little there is nothing but pure joy in shooting waiting for them. .
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"Just leave me alone, I know what to do." - Kimi Raikkonen The moment the idea is admitted into society, that property is not as sacred as the laws of God, and that there is not a force of law and public justice to protect it, anarchy and tyranny commence.' and that `Property is surely a right of mankind as real as liberty.' - John Adams http://www.usdebtclock.org/ |
#10
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Take her to a range with rentals and let her try a variety of pistols and calibers. Find out what feels best in her hand and move from there. You'll probably need to make multiple trips but more shooting never hurt anybody.
I'm in a similar situation. My 686 is just too big for my gf but so far at the range she's had a good time with a Glock 17, a Sig 226 in 9mm and a full size Kimber in .45. She did the best with the Kimber for what it's worth. |
#11
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I hope I can shed some light and save you a lot of time and money ok! My wife has recently gotten her CCW license and she went through the ordeal of selecting, firing several handguns at the indoor shooting range. NOT the best place to take a women who wants to learn how to shoot a gun.......The blessed places are very LOUD period. She tried two different Kahr's (rental guns) there and both of them jammed up, one on the 3 shot the other on the second magazine 2nd shot........NOT GOOD.
OK forgetabout those small little semi-auto pistols ladies!!! Yes, they can be easy concealed, most are NOT reliable in the first place. I am speaking of the RUGER LCP, KEL-TEC's which have very hard triggers to pull etc and JAM a bunch. We spent 2 months trying out various pistols and purchasing various types of ammo to make those little pistols go BANG!!! They were never 100% reliable....NEVER. Always had JAMS & Misfires with them period. Many women will have a hard time keeping their wrist from going "limp" and this causes misfires in little pistols like those KEL-TEC'S etc. GLOCKS have a very easy constant trigger pull, not like the Sigs, where the first shot to fire must have you pull a 10-pound trigger pull, then it gets easier with a 5.5 pound pull. The first shot is the most important 90% of the time if you have to use your gun. Another great pistol for a women, is a REVOLVER like the Smith & Wesson "Airweight" in the 38spl caliber. You can bet your life on a revolver and that is a fact. Misfire! You just pull that trigger once again for the BANG to happen. It is very fast in that respect ok. In the first place, the pistol must fit YOUR HAND ladies. YOU are not going to shoot a pistol accurately unless it does fit your hand well. It should feel good in your hand and let you grip the pistol with a strong grip. My wife had owned several pistols in the last couple of months, KEL-TEC 11, KEL-TEC PF-9, Ruger LCP, Sig-P239, Sig P-232. She now carry's a GLOCK 26 which is the 9mm Luger caliber. It fits her hand and is NOT over powering like the Sig 40 cal. Now for you ladies, who have a hard time with concealment of a pistol, a lady's purse made to conceal a pistol is the "Cat's Meow" and still lets you dress for hot weather. Last edited by Tonk; 07-10-2009 at 5:14 AM.. |
#12
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Take her to the store and let her hold the different guns
you want the one that fits her hand the best as far as caliber she is going to have to shoot a few and see
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"I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it." - Thomas Jefferson |
#13
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Okay I'm a lady and I went to the gun store (thank you bullseye) to try out the different guns and I'm going to recommend the 22 revolver handgun for several reasons.
1. I can see what's going on. Guns freak me out when I don't know why I pull the trigger and they don't go boom. This one I can tell whats going on. I can see when it's loaded and how many bullets I have to go. If one doesn't go off I just open it up and shake it out. No problems. It relieves alot of anxiety for me just to be able to understand how it works. 2. It's not very loud and it doesn't kick hard. Still not having shot that many guns it allows me to practice good shooting technique, like not flinching, which will prepare me for when I decide to go with a larger caliber and a shorter barrel. 3. The revolvers have a tendency to fit in my hand better. Neither of my hubby's guns fit my hands very well. I can't get my fingers to grip it how he says it the best way and this frustrates me to no end. 4. Cowboy gun, I've seen it on alot of movies, and think they are cool. Movies where cops and thugs are shooting over drugs don't impress me and I don't want to associate myself with those weapons. I'll take a classy Clint Eastwood model instead. So that's what I would suggest to her, maybe not reason number 4... but for all the other reasons, definitely.
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Just because you can't do everything, don't do nothing. |
#14
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Also I prefer semi-auto's for HD cause they hold more rounds, and when your out the gun locks back and is a physical reminder that your out of bullets, vs a revolver just keeps going and dosen't show you that your out....also a semi-auto is faster to re-load. The whole reliability thing is also not a problem any more....get a glock, or xd, or something like that....you won't have any problems unless you don't oil it and put 20,000 rounds through it Also as far as the gun not fitting your hand....there's lots of different guns and grips and feels and size....go to a store and feel some of them....I don't have small hands, but they aren't huge and a guy would say they are small and I don't have a problem holding a semi-auto....maybe try a single stack mag if you have too for the flinching....not much to flinch on a .22 LR, only solution is to move up to a .38 target round work with the semi's....they will most likely win you over for a HD gun....don't give up on them yet
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Last edited by shellyzsweet; 09-13-2008 at 10:54 PM.. |
#15
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The S&W referred to above is a 617. It holds 10 rounds.
.22 hollowpoints are pretty common, really. They're usually the only .22 ammo I buy... They still won't do nearly as much damage as a .38 wad-cutter or 9mm fmj, not to mention something that'll expand, but as the common saying goes, a hit with a .22 is better than a miss with a .45. That said, I do share a lot of your concerns about .22 for defense. But it's definitely better than nothing, and as long as you're willing to literally empty the whole ten rounds into someone, you should be fine. |
#16
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knew someone would say that about .22's and HP....Never seen one, but I don't own a .22 so maybe its cause I'm not looking... Never heard that phrase...heard "better to have a .380 in your pocket than a .45 at home" IDK....I wouldn't trust a .22 to save my life unless I HAD TOO, if your gonna get a HD gun, AT LEAST get a .38 special, just my .02
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#17
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There is much wisdom in this post. There is much more gun magazine hype in the posts that criticize it. If any of the posters who criticize this choice have ever actually been in a gunfight speak up.
Better the .22 you understand and are comfortable with than the forty-five that confuses and intimidates. You grow into the larger, more complicated, "more effective" guns. Meanwhile, a .22 is a lot louder from the front than it is from behind, and the criminal with a bullet in him probably will become a lot more interested in the location of the nearest emergency room than what he was planning to do to you. Granted, people on certain drugs can be almost impossible to stop. But they are only stopped by precise, or lucky, shot placement destroying physical (breaking bones) or neurological (brain or spine) systems even with bigger guns. Quote:
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Take not lightly liberty To have it you must live it And like love, don't you see To keep it you must give it "I will talk with you no more. I will go now, and fight you." (Red Cloud) |
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Wow, BillCA, that's a pretty comprehensive overview of revolver options for my lady, thanks.
Of course I will let you guys know what she choses, and how it all goes. It will be a process over several months so have patience, it will be her first ever firearm...for someone who is skittish around guns. The important thing is that she is willing to learn how to use a very important tool as part of the defense of our home and children. Hopefully she will never have to use it in self defense, but it's better to be prepared.
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Oh, yeah. .38 is pretty much my minimum "feels like enough", too.
I'd much rather use a carbine or shotgun, though. |
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but for any women that says she doesn't like the recoil on a 12 gauge....buy a knoxx stock...WELL WORTH THE MONEY!!!!
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#22
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Yeah, I know about the penetration issue (it'd be 7.62x39mm), but find the option of having pretty much pinpoint accuracy if I want/need it a very persuasive argument. That and I shoot my AK more than anything else, and in light competition run-and-gun stuff, so I feel most confident with it.
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Going a bit OT, but yes, I have an EOTech, and yes, I'm used to shooting in close with it, and have a good idea what kind of hold-off I need at close-in distances. At "indoor" range, aiming at about the hairline would put a bullet between the lookers.
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I have trained my Ex and my cousin both with the Glock 17. The size of the grip seemed to fit both very well.They are both petite ladies that work in an office.
The centerline of the bore on the Glocks is very close to the top of the hand, which reduces the muzzle flip. My Ex by her third lesson could hit 5 bowling pins at 25 feet in under 5.5 seconds. Get a Ciener 22 top end for the Glock, for her first practice sessions. 22s are alot cheaper than 9s and alot of fun too. |
#27
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My wife and daughter both have procured my .22's my daughter likes the 6" S&W 10 shot and the wife borrowed my 4" S&W. Now I have to get a new one, Oh woe is me!
I found that they will use what they want and unlike us men go by how it feels not how cool it looks. Let her choose and you will be happy she is comfortable with what she has.
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Thieves are the lowest form of life out there, except for liberal politicians, of course, but that's redundant. |
#28
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Just a thought. If you handload you can start with a larger caliber gun. I started my granddaughters at ages 6&7 with a S&W Mod. 649. A J frame 38 spcl. with shrouded hammer. I loaded it to the absolute minimum to insure positive ignition and accuracy. They are now 10&11 and handle full power 38's quite well. Next stop; .357!
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Take not lightly liberty To have it you must live it And like love, don't you see To keep it you must give it "I will talk with you no more. I will go now, and fight you." (Red Cloud) |
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Not a lady either, but I've been thinking about this a lot lately.
Both my wife and daughter have a lot of difficulties loading rounds into semi auto magazines. My daughter often can't rack the slide, despite pointing her to alternate techniques. Which BTW, you can find a lot of useful info at http://www.corneredcat.com/ . Both of them like to shoot, but they are not "in" to it enough to want to go more than a couple of times a year, and spend any practice time. But neither of them have issues with an ancient .22lr revolver of mine. Which has be thinking I have to get a revolver. I'm not a revolver guy, but I got to think about what if I'm not around. |
#30
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It's really hard to go wrong with a 4-inch fixed-sight .38 Special that will handle +P ammo. And it is relatively easy to be competent with this kind of pistol with some moderate dedication to practice. This S&W Model 10 Military & Police .38 revolver sports a five-inch barrel for added velocity and accuracy, yet has a simplicity about it's operation. At HD distances it has sufficient energy to disable or neutralize an attacker. S&W Model 10, 5-inch .38 Special circa 1970 At gun shops you might find a "little treasure" in the form of an old Colt that sat in someone's drawer for 30 years or more. For someone who shoots only a little, these are great guns with the benefit that Colts seem to rise in value faster than S&W's. For smaller hands, a Colt like this Police Positive Special, is a tad bigger than a J-Frame, holds six rounds and is smaller and lighter than a K-Frame. Colt Police Positive Special, 4-inch .38 For what it's worth, if someone has trouble racking the slide, let them try it with a Beretta 92FS/M9. While this is a large auto, the slide tends to be easier to manipulate than most, especially with the hammer cocked. Throw in a magazine loading tool to make life easier on the ladies' fingernails too. |
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while I think any gun is better than no gun and .22 is prolly the best to start with....but when its all said and done, I would want a bigger caliber and I hope that she starts with a .22 and goes up to at least a .380 or 38, but that's just my opinion. However a .22 is better than no gun at all.
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#32
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To OP,
Have you considered having your wife take a few basic shooting classes with an NRA trainer? They do offer women only classes. They generally don't have to bring a gun as the instructor or range will offer them. There are classroom sessions followed by range time. Very non competitive surrounding. Do not, I repeat DO NOT buy her a gun because we (as in hubbies) think it's a cool chick gun. Negotiate with the gun shop/range that rents guns to offer discounts if you buy a new gun from them after the training. Let her pick her own gun. Oh, taking some form of martial arts training also help in boostering her self confidence.
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"Good friends, good food & good wine. Anything else is just a waste of soy sauce.":) |
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WokMaster,
Great suggestion with the NRA instruction. I don't know why that didn't even occur to me. I'll probably take the class with her as a back-to-basics refresher for me. And don't worry, she will definitely be choosing her own gun.
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Sorry, if this was already said... I don't feel like going through ALL the pages. Take her to a range and have her shoot various guns to see which ones she's comfortable with. I know a lot of people like the glocks because of the weight and feel. I like the weight although I'm petite because it gives me balance. I know weird, huh? I want a Kimber 45.
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I have one and I loooove it. I also have Kimber's .22, fun to have matching ones.
I just adore the way they feel in my hands, not too big, not too much recoil. In fact I want to get a 1911 style grip for one of my OLLs since I like it so much. http://www.pearcegrip.com/ar15.htm |
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Try the smaller frame Glock's after she's spent some time with a .22. I find the Glock 19 and Glock 23 sized frames are a better fit for my hands than the 17 frame.
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Quemadmoeum gladuis neminem occidit, occidentis telum est. (A sword is never a killer; it is a tool in the killer's hands.) - Lucius Annaeus Seneca, 45 AD |
#39
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Keep in mind that range rentals are rearely cleaned and poorly maintained- not the examples for reliability.
I think you may be broadbrushing here. I know many women who can equally (and comfortably) shoot small compacts and large government models. That said, I am of the mind that the .22lr is a great starting point for all shooters (not just women), and to grow into calibers from there. It may be a fast transition, but at least a progression that is controllable. Your advice w/r/t Airweight gives me pause; you expect ANYone to enjoy shooting a .38 out of that? When one's life depends on it, I'd hate to have a bad first shot from anticipating the recoil. My wife likes her carry piece on her, since she usually sets her purse down or puts it into storage at work. For that, she's using the Smartcarry holster
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Brandon Combs I do not read private messages, and my inbox is usually full. If you need to reach me, please email me instead. My comments are not the official position or a statement of any organization unless stated otherwise. My comments are not legal advice; if you want or need legal advice, hire a lawyer. |
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i almost didn't pick up another revolver at the rental range because the first thing i fired was an airweight with a light .357 load. i'd never buy one or recommend it to a friend....maybe an enemy, though. geez, that thing hurt and i was scared to pick up the next rental.
i settled for a s&w model 60 snubbie which i adore....and then i started adding more and more smiths of one flavor or another. i also bought a colt mark IV officers' .45acp recently which i also adore. mz
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"The theory that a woman found dead in an alley, raped and strangled with her own pantyhose, is somehow morally superior to a woman explaining to police how her attacker got that fatal bullet wound."-- as seen on a t-shirt |
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