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Ladies Forum A place for our female Calgunners to discuss, share and interact without the 'excess attention' sometimes found in online forums.

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  #41  
Old 10-28-2012, 8:14 AM
SilverTauron SilverTauron is offline
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Originally Posted by movie zombie View Post
in concurence with Bonnie: the woman has already put herself into a compromising situation with someone she doesn't know that well when she isolated herself with you, started getting frisky and the clothes started flying. finding your firearm makes her question.....no, makes her decide....that she made a bad decision and that despite your manners and good looks and obvious sex appeal that you may be the next serial killer. while you may rejoice, Silver, to find a holster strapped to her leg, she will not reciprocate because you're either a mobster or a criminal of one type or another and she is at risk of more than just a STD. conditioning in her experience of the world, urban myths, news stories, family advise all come into play that she is now in dangerous territory and needs to get out now. that is her self-defense mechanism.
Ah. Thank you for putting things like this. Being an ex-military man I generally don't consider my dates to be a potential threat to my life, but I can see how a woman would see things differently.


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Originally Posted by movie zombie View Post
either need to be upfront re the CCW status and perhaps not get dates, or run into a woman that freaks and calls the cops on you. find a way to handle it before the clothes start flying.
Being upfront isn't a problem. The issue for me is determining the lady's attitude on carry before I open my mouth.

I told one psycho girl upfront about me carrying, and my reward for it was a threat by her to file a false harassment claim since I didn't call her back "right away". I drove to the police station and showed the desk Sergeant my phone's text message thread of her threatening me to ensure I didn't end up on the wrong end of a false DV or arrest warrant.The LEO called the crazy girl and got things straightened out , but ever since then for understandable reasons i've been very cautious about who I tell regarding my armed status.
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  #42  
Old 10-28-2012, 8:38 AM
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anyone that has a CCW should be very very cautious about who is told re armed status...imo.

in your instance, i'd consider not carrying on those "impulsive" dates or [and i know how unrealistic this is, especially for someone in your age group whether male or female] not have dates that aren't of a more serious nature. either that or get a regular call girl that isn't going to flinch when she sees the holster. seriously.

the idea that a CCW person can have a casual sex life seems to be counter intuitive to me........
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  #43  
Old 10-28-2012, 8:41 AM
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I would be up front with them. Don't try and determine if they will have a problem with it before you say anything. Someday, you would have to tell them if it turned into a serious relationship so why wait? If anything, it should put her at ease. if she knows anything about a concealed license, knowing what we have to go through to get one. The FBI knows us better now than our close friends after that intense back ground check.

If they have a problem with it....move on to someone else. I would want to know - male or female - if they had a gun before I left with them. I would probably ask to see their license. Anyone can say they have a carry license. Then I would make the decision whether to go or not.

Silver - sounds like she was a nutcase anyway. Glad to hear you went to the police before it became a nightmare.
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  #44  
Old 10-28-2012, 9:05 AM
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Originally Posted by SilverTauron View Post
Further clarification:I only told my dates about my CCW as circumstances demanded.My ex and I were Air Force,so before we left post I had to stop by the armory and sign out my carry piece.Kinda hard to avoid the topic.

Once I got out of the military,I discovered that no matter how concealed your weapon is from view,its not concealable from a frisky girl's touch."what's this...A GUN???!". From harsh experience I've discovered its a good idea to at least casually mention something about being armed before clothes start coming off.
AirForce! Thats why!! (sorry, had to say it, retired Army). I have lost a lot of shooting, training freinds because they got married to woman who are not into guns or CCW. I believe it will forever cause them friction. You should date/marry someone who has the same interests, your best friend, so your relationship grows. My wife and I have been married 32 yrs so far. Still go to the range at least every month, go to Front Sight about 8 times a year, plus all the non-gun related items as well.

Don't try to change someone, or let them try to change you, find your best friend.
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  #45  
Old 10-28-2012, 9:22 AM
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Originally Posted by movie zombie View Post
anyone that has a CCW should be very very cautious about who is told re armed status...imo.

in your instance, i'd consider not carrying on those "impulsive" dates or [and i know how unrealistic this is, especially for someone in your age group whether male or female] not have dates that aren't of a more serious nature. either that or get a regular call girl that isn't going to flinch when she sees the holster. seriously.

the idea that a CCW person can have a casual sex life seems to be counter intuitive to me........
Learned this the hard way with an idiot exposing my sidearm. Even though most of us in that group have CCW's this guy just decided to be an idiot. He's not a welcome part of any group I am with from now on.
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  #46  
Old 10-28-2012, 2:46 PM
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Originally Posted by SilverTauron View Post
To understand my question we must first delve into some history.

My last girlfriend was a latina from The Bronx. Yup, that Bronx. As such her exposure to firearms was limited and negative before meeting me. While she didn't tell me at the time, the girl thought that I was some kind of macho douchebag for "needing to carry a gun everywhere" .Apparently that impression went away when she observed that I was extremely safe with it, but nevertheless the fact stuck with me.

Several casual encounters since then have added to my confusion. An Obama/Biden supporter loved the fact I carried a pistol, and a first date went so bad she threatened to call the police on account of me legally carrying.

So to avoid pre-date labelling and uncomfortable encounters with LE in the future, it would help me greatly to understand what non-firearm associated women think of men who carry frequently, at least as a first impression.

Thanks in advance for intelligent contributions!
I actually grew up in the "BRONX" during the 1970's and during that time crime was "very bad". Most of the "Bronx" at that time had deteriorated to where "Berlin" looked better post world war two.

The only people who had guns in New York at the time were police and criminals, few regular folks had guns due to the "Sullivan law".

While there are differences between men and women regarding how they view guns, there is a big difference between how folks from New York view guns.

In general, ex New Yorkers either true to impose NY style gun laws on everyone else when they leave or they go the correct way and arm themselves to the teeth.

Be discreet about being a gun owner when you first meet someone, if you meet someone that you want to keep in your life, you may want to start of the gun issue first about attitudes on owning guns first.

Don't come off as "Rambo", downplay things and be sensitive.

Women don't want to hurt people, that is why self-defense tools such as mace, pepper spray and stun guns heavily market that they don't cause permanent injuries.

The fact that in many cases the only way to stop a violent attack is to "INJURE" the attacker is something that many women have a "mental block" on because it goes against their "core believes".

Women operate far more "emotionally", so that is how you need to approach the subject.

Half the people who show up at my shoots are female btw and I'm running my shoots in the SF bay area, so there is hope.

This is a good question, perhaps we as a community need to come up with a "focus group", answer FAQ and post it in a video format as a learning tool.

Nicki
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  #47  
Old 10-30-2012, 12:30 PM
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Paranoid much? In my 42 years on this planet, I have never seen, much less experienced a violent crime.
Then you are very lucky. I've personally been raped (at knifepoint), come heart-stoppingly close to being gang raped (at gunpoint), been cyber-stalked by a group of whackos whose threats against my family were credible enough to interest both the FBI and US Attorney's office, and had the misfortune of being next to a friend of mine when a group of people she'd pissed off decided to jump her.

The fact that the odds of a violent crime happening to you are low (about 1 in 300 per year), the fact is that those statistics are not likely to be much comfort if you're the 1 in 200 it happens to. The latest FBI Uniform Crime Report data cited about 1.2 million violent crimes in the United States last year - and that's near to a historical low.

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  #48  
Old 10-30-2012, 7:57 PM
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thought you were older, Silver!
i mean that as a compliment: you've participated here in the Ladies Forum with a maturity that is lacking by many that are older than you.

He's from South Dakota. They make good men up there.

Except for the 'casual encounters' part.

Last edited by Glock Girl in CA; 10-30-2012 at 8:03 PM..
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  #49  
Old 10-30-2012, 8:48 PM
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because the clothes they are flying!
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"Her hands, her comfort, her confidence, her choice.", Mr K re buying a gun for a woman.

Gun Control:
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  #50  
Old 10-30-2012, 9:12 PM
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because the clothes they are flying!
Witty, intelligent AND funny is our Movie Zombie!
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